Gamers The Movie Blog

Happy Holidays!

Christopher Folino — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 18:51:12 -0800

Wow...I remembered the password and bam!
Look at me blogging again!
What up?
So the Greatest American Hero comic book which Bill, myself and Derek McCaw wrote just came out.
Sparks issue 1 is coming out on the iphone in Jan 2009 and we got some other cool things planned as well.

Gamers The Movie wow, maybe I'll get drunk and watch it again, it's been like 2 years since I've watched it.
What are the new plans for 2009?

Sparks will be coming to the iphone and we are talking to two movie studios about making it into a feature.

We have some other cool things planned as well.

Visit us at our other website www.catastrophiccomics.com

Sparks the comic book comes out this Wednesday -Check out the book and the press

Christopher Folino — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 06:16:06 -0700

I have to admit having Gamers come out in May and then to have Sparks the comic book I wrote and co-created with William Katt (Greatest American Hero) is really frickin cool!

Sparks issue one of six is 32 pages in full color and retails for $2.99. It's available at your loca comic book store or if you need to order it via the internet buy it from the place Bill and I shop, Collectors Paradise

http://comicsandcards.net/

By the way on Wednesday June 25th 5PM to 8PM William Katt and myself will be signing at the store.

7131 Winnetka Ave

Winnetka CA 91306

818 999-9455 cparadise@socal.rr.com

Here's a link to Newsarama, which has the first ten pages up for preview

http://www.newsarama.com/php/multimedia/album.php?aid=18510

Here's an article Newsarama did about Sparks

http://www.newsarama.com/comics/080613-KattComics.html

Here's an article about William Katt and his appearance on the hit show Heroes

http://www.newsarama.com//tv/080613-KattHeroes.html

REVIEWS OF THE FIRST ISSUE OF SPARKS

Broken Frontier

http://www.brokenfrontier.com/reviews/details.php?id=1851

Comics and other Imaginary Tales

http://comicsand.blogspot.com/2008/05/sparks-1-review.html

And we got a huge announcement for Catastrophic Comics at Comic Con and check our booth out at the show, we just got Illusive Arts Entertainment booth, so it will be a good time!

A new review of Gamers

Christopher Folino — Wed, 21 May 2008 15:48:57 -0700

Here's a new review of Gamers from The Entertainment Review. It's pretty damn cool! This has been a nice week and Tiffany and Jenny from Monterey Media really have been working over time to get the word out and they've done a fantastic job.

Go Gamers! Keep renting it and getting your friends also!

Here's part of the review, click on to read the full review below.

"This mockumentary shows that with a low budget and a short shooting time, with the right actors, and more importantly, with the right script, any film can become a hit, even if to a select group of viewers. “Gamers” can be said to be almost as good as any big budget comedy, but was created at a fraction of the price with probably twice as many laughs. Audiences will of course have to take into consideration that the film was shot in six days, making the film even better than originally thought.

In the end, “Gamers” proves to be a film that real world RPG gamers can appreciate, especially since many filmmakers steer clear of
such minute stories as that of a group of pen and paper RPG gamers. Also, while many non-gamers will have laughs here and there throughout the film, the majority of “Gamers” is for those who have played these types of games and many of the jokes allude to Dungeons & Dragons, which can be greatly appreciated by those who have played it."

FULL REVIEW

http://www.theentertainmentreview.com/movies/gamers.html

Gamers Ranked #75 -Life Changing Overnight

Christopher Folino — Mon, 19 May 2008 04:55:49 -0700

I can't believe it, I woke up this morning and I have exactly 511 emails, mostly from media and movie stars. Entertainment Tonight and the Hollywood Reporter both want exclusive interviews to talk about what some folks are calling the most dramatic jump of one film in IMDB's History, from a ranking of 6,063 on May 11th to number 75 on May 18th.

I'm leaning more towards Entertainment Tonight since my mom did give me the middle name Christopher "Entertainer" Folino, I've never revealed that before until today's blog, I felt it was it too much pressure." But, now, since Gamers is ranked 75, I can embrace my middle name with gusto!

So, I received emails from my new friend Charlie who writes.

"Chris, Congrats, let's grab lunch, I can't believe your movie ranked ahead of my hit TV show by 2 MovieMeter points, this pisses me off almost as much as my x-wife! Just joking, all the best to you and may my X go to die being donkey punched" -Charlie

Yes, being ranked number 75 is amazing. By the way Monterey Media, our fine distribution company, Gamers has just set a record for your company that the little Eye of Dolphin and that Dali Lame dude couldn't give you. A movie ranked 75 on IMDB!

It's better than being Wil Smith in "I am Legend" ranked number 83. The movie should be retitled "I am not so legend compared to Gamers"

Who would ever think they would live to see Gamers dethrown Battlestar Galactica (86), Family Guy (86), The Departed (89), and Friends (91). Well, Hell has frozen over my friends!

I think the phone call that will forever stay with me comes from the second greatest film director now, a new friend of mine, who I call Francis whose film "The Godfather" ranks just 95. I'm coming after you in the wine world next Francis! Look out!

And dear Meredith Zealy, lovely woman that you are, Hey, that little movie you made back in the day, that everyone loves, "The Notebook" is ranked 97! Hey Chick Flick...suck it!

And here's another mind blowing fact, if Hollywood could gather all the top 17,265 hollywood stars together, and God forbid a metor would strike them down...guess, who would be then be the number one ranked STARmeter on IMDB, that's right, then my midget epic "Little Miss Braveheart Sunshine" could finally get green lit!

Since Gamers is now ranked #75 on the IMDB MovieMeter, I don't even have to drive, I have three studios who sent limos outside my home. Sure, most the studios are porn, but, who cares!

By the way people, other than myself have benefited greatly from Gamers being ranked so high

Kevin Sherwood is now ranked 5,525 on IMDB STARmeter. So maybe he miss that meteor accident and the rest of the cast of Gamers that day, I'll share the spotlight!

Do I really have to go to work this week? You know I'm going to be such a dick at work, "Are those the kind of graphics you would make for the man whose movies ranked #75 on IMDB? I didn't think so...do it again" And you can bet your ass I'll be saying "I'm sorry, Chicken Picata may be what the other are eating in the lunch cafeteria, however, nobody here's got a movie ranked #75 on IMDB, so go inside that God Damn kitchen and make me a fucking hot pocket!"

Yes, I will have no problem going to work or being me this week!

Gamers Ranked #75 on IMDB!

Christopher Folino — Sun, 18 May 2008 17:43:00 -0700

For some reason the movie shot up today to 75 on IMDB, that means we are what 74 spots away from kicking Iron Mans ass? :)

Wow, too bad we don't get money for being in the top 100!

I wish I could say this changes everything, I emailed Monterey Media and said can you use this to go get cable rights!

We got to get that debt paid off baby!

Okay, here's a shameless plug for Sparks the comic book coming out in June!

Some incredible reviews

“This book opens up firing on all cylinders and to be honest a book has not excited me as much as this one from the first issue. Not Proof, not Transhuman, heck I can’t think of anything that I genuinely enjoyed this much from the get go. Get it added to your pull list now, this is going to be something.”

Full Review

http://www.brokenfrontier.com/reviews/details.php?id=1851

AND

Here is our first review of Sparks, it comes from the folks over at Comics and Other Imaginary Tales!

http://comicsand.blogspot.com/2008/05/sparks-1-review.html

This is sweet! I’m not going to lie! I’m beyond excited!

AND an Interview if you want to really be bored!

Want to read an interview that more than likely will kill my career in the comic book industry? Who am I kidding, I have no career! Okay, hee ya go!

http://comicsand.blogspot.com/

Serious, this was an incredible opportunity and many thanks to Jim and Lee!

The Day of No Days

Christopher Folino — Wed, 07 May 2008 04:39:58 -0700

So, I had to work late yesterday and I wasn't able to go to my local Best Buy Store in Thousand Oaks, CA to pick up or at least take a picture of Gamers on the shelf! Serious, this is a once in a life time opportunity to stand in a retail store and laugh and be proud that some how, some way, our indie film which we did for our own self amusement was deemed worthy enough to be sold to consumers. I may never have this opportunity again and I at least wanted to experience it once in my life time. Because, let's be honest, I think it was about one week on the shelf for new releases before they never re-order again!

So, Rose my wife calls me up, she knows I'm working late and says, "Hey Honey, I'm at Best Buy, I brought the three kids and the video camera and we were going to surprise you with a video of Angelina who wanted to spend her Best Buy gift certifcate on a copy of Gamers. How cool is that? My seven year old really was going to do that, see what good taste she has in movies!

Well guess what? Best Buy didn't have Gamers out on the shelf, they had 4 copies somewhere in the back and nobody had time to place it out and really didn't give care.

So, my daughter ended up buying the movie "The Game Plan" featuring the Rock.

Seriously, God...at some point you can stop giving me writing material. And that whole thing about you can't experience great love without experiencing Great pain...it's okay, I'm shallow, I prefer shallow love.

2 1/2 years...well what's one more day right?

Short new blog is any good?

Christopher Folino — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 05:09:33 -0700

I am closing in on the whole yearbook thing, this weekend I will climb the rafters and find an old yearbook. I will find some poor bastard that wrote "keep in touch" and after all these years, I'm making them my new B.F.F. just for this blogs amusement! I think I may have kept one yearbook where my friends and I started a "movie making club" called the Silver Screen Club and we were in the yearbook. Don't laugh bitches! We got Richard Blade to D.J. a dance and we had money! Enough money to make horrible movies!

Our club was pretty bitchin! We got an old Super 8 camera donated to us by my hairdresser at the time, her name was Rachel and she ended up becoming mayor of El Monte. See you bitches! You help me out and good things like becoming mayor of El Monte will happen to you! Just think if you buy Gamers next Tuesday, you may end up not only winning the lotto, you'll end up dating a super model. That's what happens when you help out CHRISTopher Folino.

Wow, I'm going to hell, do not pass go, straight to hell! By the way for all you parents-to-be or kid's under the age of six. Speaking of HELL, Monopoly makes a version of Monopoly for kid's and the one my daughter owns is Disney Monopoly and the rules are different. Once you land .., bam, you own it right away and get to place a hotel on it and the rules are "so not the way I learned", I was pissed off playing it with my seven year old daughter! This is "Fucking bullshit", what do you mean there is no jail? Where does Lindsay Lohan and the cast of Raven go then? To lunch? Serious, Jail is now Lunch!Oh...Disney! How dare you make Monopoly easier and kinder for kids.

I had to play off the big board when I seven! And look at me now, whenever I a cop pulls me over I like pull out my wallet and show him "My get out jail card free" We have a quick laugh, some drinks, some more drinks, and before I know it, it's dawn and I wake up naked in a dirty hotel on Baltic Avenue with an iron, a car, a dog, a shoe, a wheelbarrow, a top hat, a thimble, a cannon, a battleship, and a sack of money. I take the sack of money, I give the wife a new iron (she has 32 new irons in the last 7 months), and bring the cannon to finish off the collection for my backyard. And yes bitches, I have six battleships which I own and rent to the U.S. Government! I want this war to continue!

Wow, what a blog...can't wait for the kid's to grow up to be proud of this one!

By the way, the whole term "Bitches" came from when I was like 16 and my mom was so mad about me leaving my crap out and she came down hard on me. And under my breath as she walked away "I said "Bitch" And damn if superwoman didn't hear me and she said "What did you say?" And I was such an idiot and a horrible liar I'm like "No, no, not you, I was talking about my shoes, I call them bitches!"

Oh, man, what an idiot! Not much has changed at all for me. Except my mom is dead and my bitches are double wide and I'm order some new ones!

Gamers Sequel is Green lighted! -Director found rich investor!

Christopher Folino — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 01:33:51 -0700

Breaking News! Gamers 2 is Green Lighted -Director finds rich investor from Africa

Looks like we can all retire and make movies full time!
What is better than winning the lotto or getting into a film festival?
It's getting a random email from my new best friend Mr. Godwin Elisha from the Bank of Africa who had a rich client died and wants us to pose as next of kin to collect $12,500,000.00
All we have to do is give him our personal information and the Twelve Million is ours, no problem!

Here is my email response to Mr. Godwin Elisha from the Bank of Africa.

Dearest Mr. Godwin Elisha,
First off, "Nooko naka leka luka!" That's pagan talk for "Hell fucking yeah! let's do this fucking deal, my brother from another mother!"
I got to first say your name comforts me....it has God and Win in it!
How can anything go wrong? And then your last name is Elisha!
And there's a hobbit named Eljah Woods! I love hobbits and trust them because they saved us from evil in the middle east of earth!
By the way I talked to George W. Bush's God today and he said as long as your name isn't Pablo, Carlos, or Juan that I could trust you!
So Mr. Godwin, attached is all my personal information, social, wife and kid's names, addresses, bank accounts!
Please let me know the second you start putting the 12 million plus into my bank!
Again, it's such a blessing to be the "chosen one" and thank Africa for all it's poverty and diseases for killing off that rich client! I'm betting he died of AIDS! It's like so rampant there, it's kind of like our American Idol craze in America, but a little deadlier!
Well, you can bet I'll be doing lots of good with this money! Dave Hanson and Kevin Kirkpatrick will be driving around in pimped out Escalade in no time with tribal warefare furry dice!
And if you can send me a big old bag of Sierra Leone diamonds or A.K.A. :"Conflict Diamonds" for my wife, I missed her birthday, See, if I get them diamonds it's resolves all Conficts! Hence, the name!

Best of luck,
Chris Folino

The Competition

Christopher Folino — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 23:12:34 -0700

We're almost a week away from the "DAY OF ALL DAYS"

The release of Gamers on May 6th 2008 and lets be honest with each other, what's the competition going to be like in terms of new DVD releases?

Let's take a look! All material gathered from http://www.dvdtalk.com/reviews/bargain.php

Because, I know that both the release of Iron Man the movie and the new Grand Theft Auto video game will both be flops and kids will want some real entertainment!

Yeah...that's what I keep telling myself!

Bewitched: Complete Sixth Season -That witch is going down and so is at least one of the two Darrin Stephens!

Bridges of Madison County -Serious? Didn't this fucking chick-flick come out already? Fucking bullshit that Clint made this movie!

Crossing Jordan: Season 1 -Oh bring it! Gamers will cross check you woman!

Hottie and the Nottie -Serious, if anyone rents this film, I hope you get whatever diseases actively live inside Paris Hilton's vagina.

First Sunday -How can one even try to compete with Ice Cube, Tracy Morgan and Katt Williams! Well, we got a midget and William Katt!

I'm Not There -You rent this movie about Bob Dylan, and try to understand a word he says and get back to me!

Oprah Winfrey Presents Mitch Albom's for One More Day -I hate when people use stars to sell their product that doesn't really include their involvement, by the way make sure in June you get William Katt presents Sparks the comic book.

Over Her Dead Body -If you rent this film than you deserve to get at least half of whatever diseases acitvely live inside Paris Hilton's vagina.

P.S. I Love You -If Hilary Swank fought Gerard Butler than I'd say go rent this fucking movie instead of Gamers! That would be cool!

Senior Skip Day -Ahhh, what the hell?

Serial Mom the collector's edition -Yeah, that movie just screamed out please release a collector's edition. Wow, I guess

Teeth -Hey, look it's the movie about what dieseases actively live inside Paris Hilton vagina.

And lastly, here is a links to the new Gary Busey videos we did for work.

http://xbox360.ign.com/dor/objects/882586/saints-row-2/videos/saintsrow_heavyweapons_042508.html

Review of the new Eagles CD by Paul Hoffmeier

Christopher Folino — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 04:28:57 -0700

Paul Hoffmeier ia a talented video game producer and a great guy who sadly, like myself was given the new Eagles CD by a fellow dad at our kid's school to listen too! This new Eagles CD has been passed around by at least 4 dads who all remember how great the Eagles once were! Now without further set-up a review of the new Eagles CD by Paul Hoffmeier.

~~Sucking~~, (I mean…)

SOARING LIKE AN EAGLE

When I listen to an album the first or second time, I really try to focus on what they are trying to tell me. So I popped in the Eagles’ latest and listened…well, it was more of a conversation. The following is excerpts from the transcript.

Long Road out of Eden (ALBUM TITLE)

PAUL: I get it. It’s a metaphor for they’ve been banished from the garden where all is good. Which, by the way, is the place where perfect albums are recorded.

Song 1- DISC 1

No More Walks in the Wood

PAUL: The Eagles should be locked up without instruments so they can’t have experiences like walking in the woods to write songs about.

Also, a 2 minute song, is not a song. Get a little more to sing about, huh? OR At least the pain of song 1 only lasted 2 minutes. Not sure which comment to go with on this one.

EAGLES: “Where we made our own weather”

PAUL: I hope you’re better at making weather than writing and singing songs.

EAGLES: “Like a bluebird with his heart removed”

PAUL: Kinda like the way I wish I could have my ear drums removed.

Song 2-DISC 1

How Long

PAUL: How long…will this song go on?(Too Easy)

EAGLES: “How long woman will you weep”

PAUL: All depends on how many discs of crap you packaged up.

Song 3-DISC 1

Busy Being Fabulous

PAUL: That’s the answer…the question…

‘Why didn’t you spend the time to make the rest of this CD tolerable?’

To be honest…this song had a good sound to it. They didn’t strain anything, nothing fancy, wouldn’t change the radio if this came on.

Song 4-DISC 1

What do I do with my heart

PAUL: bury it with all the original recordings from this album

EAGLES: “I can hold back my tears”

PAUL: Well Glen Frey…I can’t. Remember Hotel California? Evidentially not.

EAGLES: “I still want to know, when my arms let you go.”

PAUL: Yes, I’m losing feeling to my extremities as well.

Song 5-DISC 1

Guilty of the Crime

EAGLES: “You’re the only one who’s ever heard my song”

PAUL: If only, Don; If only.

EAGLES: “I might be lonely now”

PAUL: Yes, you will be.

EAGLES: “I’m Guilty of the crime.”

PAUL: I’d like to enter this disc as exhibit A.

Song 6-DISC 1

I Don’t Want to hear any more

PAUL: I’ll do the commentating, thank you.

PAUL: …and the number one worst title for a song…EVER…is…

EAGLES: “It not the first time I’ve had the sense that something’s wrong”

PAUL: Song 1…Song2…hmmm, you’re correct.

EAGLES: “I know you’re trying hard to break it to me gently”

PAUL: Nope.

EAGLES: “I know how this all ends”

PAUL: Not soon enough?

Song 7-DISC 1

Waiting in the weeds

PAUL: I’m confused…I like the way this started(But soon got over it)

EAGLES: “I don’t know when I realized the dream was over”

PAUL: I can tell you,Song 1!

EAGLES: “I’ve been waiting in the weeds waiting to…”

PAUL: …spring a horrible album on unsuspecting ears?

PAUL: Whoops! 5 minutes into this nearly 8 minute song, my CD suddenly skipped to the next song. Oh well.

Song 8-DISC 1

No More Cloudy Days

EAGLES: “These cloudy days, they make you wanna cry”

PAUL: You wanna cry!?

EAGLES: “I believe in second chances.”

PAUL: Thus, disc 2.

Song 9-DISC 1

Fast Company

EAGLES: “You keep on running”

PAUL: I’ll take that advice next time I wanna buy one of your new albums.

EAGLES: “Help me try to remember”

PAUL: Help you remember…when you didn’t suck?

Song 10-DISC 1

Do Something

EAGLES: “When I feel like giving up and ready to walk away, in the stillness I can hear a voice inside me say…”

PAUL: …give up walk away from the mic and let people remember the good songs?

EAGLES: “…Do something”

PAUL: Oh…my bad.

EAGLES: “I pick up the morning paper and all the news is bad.”

PAUL: I can see the headline, EAGLES RELEASE NEW ALBUM.

EAGLES: You can’t run away.

PAUL: No, but 10 songs ago I had enough life in me that I could have hit the stop button. Now…sadly my spirit is broken.

Song 11-DISC 1

You Are Not Alone

PAUL: Yes I am. The memories of great Eagles songs WERE with me. Then they heard what I was listening to and now I am alone.

EAGLES: “Say goodbye to all the pain and sorrow”

PAUL: Huh? Oh, this is the last song. Wait! Disc Two! AAARRRRRGH.

EAGLES: “I will always be your friend”

PAUL: Friends don’t give friends sucky songs…’cept for the ALS 1^st Grade Dad’s Club.

Thanks guys. (sarcasm added for effect).

Need a break before disc two. Maybe a vacation. Long vacation. Some hard alcohol, too.

~~Sucking~~, (I mean…)

SOARING LIKE AN EAGLE: The Pain Continues

After a few days to heal…Disc 2. I’ll make this one a little quicker...unless it’s just as bad.

Song 1- DISC 2

Long Road out of Eden

PAUL: Ten minutes and 17 Seconds of my life I will never get back!

PAUL: Way to emphasize LONG.

Song 2- DISC 2

I Dreamed there was no War

PAUL: Instrumental, smartest thing you’ve done the whole album.

PAUL: Stupid war!

Song 3- DISC 2

Somebody

PAUL: I just realized, I’m not listening to the words anymore. That’s not fair to them. If this is a conversation then I’ll have to start listening again.

EAGLES: “There’s a Jack-O’-Lantern moon in the midnight sky”

PAUL: Awe crap, why did I start listening again?!

EAGLES: “Somebody’s gonna die”

PAUL: It’ll be you guys, the first time you play this song on stage.

Song 4- DISC 2

Frail Grasp on the Big Picture

EAGLES: “We never seem to learn the lessons of history.”

PAUL: Like bands who can’t call it quits after any signs of talent have left? Seriously, you got huge amounts of gambling debt to pay off? Who spent any time in the studio and continued to think this was a good idea?

EAGLES: “Heaven help us.”

PAUL: Create the universe in 7 days, fine; but this one may be too big even for Him.

Song 5- DISC 2

Last Good Time in Town

PAUL: Yup, you all should be chased out of town and live with the other people who shouldn’t be allowed near people. Unibomber, Don Henley. Don, this is the Unibomber. You get top bunk.

EAGLES: “I like the way that sounds.”

PAUL: I can count how many people feel that way on one finger…my middle one.

Song 6- DISC 2

I Love to Watch a Woman Dance

PAUL: Me too, way more than I like hearing you sing.

EAGLES: “Her hips begin to circle slowly.”

PAUL: Like your careers circle the drain?

EAGLES: “They take her a million miles away.”

PAUL: Please take the Eagles there too.

EAGLES: “She takes my hand.”

PAUL: Who took your musical talent?

PAUL: This song really stands out. I had no idea they could suck this much. He started talk singing, it can’t possibly get any worse!

Song 7- DISC 2

Business as Usual

PAUL: Suckin’ song after song.

EAGLES: “People in denial.”

PAUL: Sing about what you know.

EAGLES: “We’re Burning time.”

PAUL: My ears are burning.

EAGLES: “You try to do good.”

PAUL: I do good, yes, something you might wanna try sometime.

PAUL: Hey Eagles, at this point, how do you feel about your latest bunch of songs?

EAGLES: “Soul sucking.”

PAUL: Mildly put…but accurate.

Song 8- DISC 2

Center of the Universe

EAGLES: “I hate to disappoint you.”

PAUL: Okay, then drop dead.

EAGLES: “I’ll always be beside you.”

PAUL: (Picks up the phone) Tom? Hey, what do you know about restraining orders.

Song 9- DISC 2

It’s Your World Now

PAUL: Did you decide to take your own life? Don’t tease me now.

EAGLES: “The gentle breezes blow.”

PAUL: You blow!

EAGLES: “I must be leaving soon.”

PAUL: J

EAGLES: “The time we shared went by so fast.”

PAUL: Fast?! Evolution feels quick compared to the time we spent.

EAGLES: “No sad goodbyes.”

PAUL: I’m throwing a party.

EAGLES: “The curtain falls.”

PAUL: Nobody make eye contact. They might see that as a signal for an encore.

EAGLES: “I take my bow.”

PAUL: Boy would I love to be behind you with a steel tipped boot you no talent, ass clown.

PAUL: I made it. Old Eagles songs, you’ve been kinda silent, do you want to comment on this travesty?

OLD EAGLES: “Wasted Time”

OLD EAGLES: “Out of Control”

OLD EAGLES: “Heartache Tonight”

OLD EAGLES: “Love Will Keep us Alive”

OLD EAGLES: We’ll “Try and Love Again”

OLD EAGLES: We’re sending “The Disco Strangler” over to each of their houses.

OLD EAGLES: “Most of Us Are Sad”

OLD EAGLES: Now that it’s over…I’ve got a “Peaceful Easy Feeling”

PAUL: Until tonight…and the nightmares.

PAUL: Say goodnight Old Eagles Songs.

OLD EAGLES: Goodnight Old Eagles Songs!

Failing at the Blog

Christopher Folino — Thu, 24 Apr 2008 22:45:31 -0700

Look at me failing at my blog duty! I suck!

So, I'm having a hard time finding my high school yearbook, either it's stored away in the rafters on my garage or I threw it away a few years back. Serious, I learned after my mother died and having to go threw her writings and pics that I didn't want my children to learn how warped Daddy really is! The first thing of my own I threw away was poetry, seriously, I made the movie Gamers what poem about dice and a fucking Paladin is anyone going to print? And a diary, oh my God, why? Why even write one, it's bound to be found and I know the kid I was at the age of 18, I would beat up today!

Well, let's talk Gamers! My God, what is happening on IMDB! Seriously, the movie is ranked like 974. Of all the movies ever made, Gamers for at least until May 6th is ranked above them! I can say without a doubt "Fuck you, Three Men and Baby" Gamers is kicking your ass! You male bitches! What does a high IMDB ranking mean? Honestly, I have no clue, it's just cool to go to the restaurants and say "Hey, how you doing, I got the 974 top rated movie on IMDB, place me at a nice table. And bam, who isn't eating by the window table at Applebees! That's right bitches! Mr. My movie is ranked 974 on IMDB!

Now being a cross promotional whore, thank you! Sparks is going to get it's 1st review in about a week and I'm excited about it. Doing the comic book thing has been really fun and I've been saving up money and buying a lot of graphic novels and wow, there are some amazing writers! Love the whole Bendis and the Daredevil run and Sleeper by Ed Brubaker.

And working with William Katt has been pretty funny, I have gotten to the point that I can make him so uncomfortable in less than 20 seconds. Serious, just for my own amusement, sometimes when we talk in person, I'll stop, hold his hand and tell him how much his friendship means to me and how he is my Greatest American friend." To Bill's credit, he hasn't beat the shit out of me yet!

Tomorrow's blog is going to be a real treat, I have a guest blogger who will be reviewing the new Eagles CD. Seriously, this is worth clicking back for tomorrow!

All the best and thanks to all 3 of you still reading this blog!

An unclear mind and future

Christopher Folino — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 00:06:36 -0700

Before, I can go and find my old yearbook, I thought I'd blog a bit on what's about to happen in the next few months.

Thoughts on Gamers being released -It's like having one of your kid's leave the house and he's going to get a shot at the world.

So, your nervous as hell and excited at the same time. Part of me wants to kind of close the books on Gamers and go out there and take everything we learned from making the movie and try it again. The real question becomes what's next? Comedy or Drama?

If Gamers has any legs, wouldn't it be smart to make another comedy?

But, then again, fuck it, when have I've done anything smart? Other than in marriage. I made sure Rose was smarter, better looking and a great person so that my kid's would have a chance!

Right now, between a full time job and then some, a family, and working on the comic books, and attempting to blog, I wish I had a clock that could stop time, so, I could get everything done. However, if I had that clock that could stop, I know I'd go around and just fuck with people and waste the free time away!

Thoughts on Sparks the comic book being released in June

The ashcan has hit over 4,400 store across America yesterday, some major ads have run in Diamond's April Previews Magazine and two more ads will run in Diamond's May Previews Magazine, in fact, the front cover of the order form for consumers will feature an ad for Sparks issue #2.

If Sparks fails, It won't be from trying, now the book has to win people over.

So, who the hell knows, we have the first three issues for the press to review, and at some point I need to finalize the text for book 4 and get that boy done.

JM Ringuet is on book 5 and continues to do an amazing job.

Sparks for me was harder to work on than Gamers The Movie, because the story is pretty dark and it's a drama. I mostly feel safe with comedy and midget porn.

I look at Ian's life and even though he's a regular guy trying to be a hero, he's got some bad fucking luck. his life is worse than the entire family from the TV show "Party of Five".

Serious, I write Sparks like he's stuck in a Bruce Springsteen song from Darkness on the Edge of Town record and I'm not cutting him any slack.

So what's the redeeming quality about him and why should people read the story?

Well, Sparks starts off reporting his death and then we just tell the story of how he got to this fucked up moment. And I really am trying to put some twists and turns into the story, I'm a big fan of Lost when it's good and I like that kind of story telling. Hopefully, we capture some of that in Sparks.

And you know what, Ian Sparks is a really good guy, but he's got to overcome some things in life that would break a lesser man, many times over.

Personally, it's been an amazing experience to work with one artist who is bringing this idea to life. JM Ringuet is making every page and Bill has spent a lot of money on Sparks and I'm not use to anyone spending money on my ideas. I just pray he gets his money back, otherwise, he's going to make me wear his old Hero costume while I in that fucking red Hero outfit for a long time!

E Street Band Member Danny Federici dies at 58

Bruce Springsteen's longtime keyboard player Danny Federici passed away last night, he was battling melanoma for three years.

What a blow to the E-Street Band, these guys have been together for decades. It's hard to see your heroes pass on.

When I went and saw Bruce at Anaheim a few weeks back, it just wasn't the same, the new guy who was replacing Danny kept looking out at the audience and I kinda wanted to smack him in the head and tell the geek to get back to "work". I never wanted to smack Mr. Federici, he was the bomb! I've enjoyed his music and he will be sorely missed.

To Quote Bruce" Everything dies baby that's a fact, but maybe everything that dies someday comes back."

Keeping the Streak Alive!

Christopher Folino — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 17:35:31 -0700

Keeping the Streak Alive!

I found it interesting to play let's call up the cast of Gamers the other day and see who picks up! By the way, for all you kid's keeping score at home both Joe Nieves (Fernando) and Dave Hanson (Reese) called me back. Of course, I did not return their calls. I'm the fucking director, when I call those bitch actors up, they best answer on the first ring, otherwise, they may not appear in my next film, Midget Porn Bob and Manga Sue Lee. It's a love story with a hell of a catchy title, you got to give me that at least!

Well, the whole blog got me to thinking, what if we go back, I'm talking way back. 1986 tobe exact to my High School Senior Year at Bishop Amat. And what if I pick from random one the folks who wrote in my yearbook"Stay in Touch" and I track them down and ask them for a place to crash and live at for a while I search for a new liver, drinking Mountain Dew for 30 years for B-fast, lunch and dinner have almost killed my liver!

What do you think will happen? I'm going to pick a person who I haven't talked with since 1986 to make it more fun! Hell, maybe I should podcast the phone call!

Now, since I do have a full time job and I have a family, I can only dedicate 12 hours a day to my blogs. I have responsibilities and shit. The kids need to know they have a daddy who can out drink them and calls them his little umpa lumpas and shit! I'm an a self-esteem builder!

On Friday, I'm going to post the top five yearbook messages, and I will pick the worst, most cheesy ones! However, to make this totally interactive I will allow the three of you who read this blog to pick the person from 1986 andI will call and seriously ask to crash at their home.

Yes, if that's not more entertaining than free 20 seconds of porn videos and Dancing with the Stars combined, then I truly do not know entertainment!

TV/Cinema frustrations in my lifetime

Christopher Folino — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 05:31:46 -0700

TV/Cinema frustrations in my lifetime

Here are my frustrations from the ages of 5 to 16 with TV and Cinema.

First frustrations with TV/Cinema

Age 5-10

Davey & Goliath –I knew the cartoon had to suck when my Catholic grade school would let us watch it. I would dream that Goliath would stop talking retarded-like and just take a big old chunk out of Davey!
For some reason I also kept praying Gumby and Pokey would cross over to this crap cartoon show and would go "Brokeback" on Davey!
I wanted to taste "Clay blood" as a child! However, I was forced to see "acts of goodness" over and over again!
That's what you get when the creator consults with the church for a cartoon.

Speed Racer –Other than wondering why Speed just didn't check the trunk before each race to make sure that Spritle and Chim, Chim, weren't hiding there, I never questioned this awesome violent piece of work!
Serious Pops, just needed to put a lock on the trunk on Mach 5!

(I'm sorry the new live action movie looks like chim chim's ass)

Star Wars Holiday Special –No child under the age of eight should ever turn to his older brother and say "Man, this show sucks! Serious, what the hell is this crap?"
My eyes still burn today Mr. Lucas, they still burn today.

Remember the TV show "Emergency?" When I was a kid I thought Dr. Kelly Brackett and Captain "Henry Stanley were the same guy.
It would frustrate me as a kid that some casting agent would allow this to happen, and hence ruin my viewing experience.

The Cylon Centurions kill ratio on the original "Battlestar" Galactica has to be lowest ever in cinema history. At some point I was rooting for one of those bastards robots to kill any character with a gun. Hell, even a ricochet would have been fine by me! I have never seen such horrible shooting. I believed the Storm troopers from "Star Wars" sucked because at the time I thought they were human, and their helmets prohibited them from "good visual" killing.
However, a robot programmed to be horrible marksmen is just a crime against evil. The Tech guy who programmed the Cylons should be kicked in the nuts.

Age 10-16

Super Friends –Why the hell did the chick from the "Wonder Twins" get to be all the cool animals and her brother was always a form of water.

The Dukes of Hazzard –Sometime, in the middle of the second season I had enough, I wrote a fan letter to Boss Hogg and told him to just kill the Duke boys in cold blood. Serious, do you know how many cars you've lost because of them? I think the entire town would help you cover up their killings." I never did hear back from old Boss Hogg on that letter.

Indian Jones and the Temple of Doom –My mom let me skip school for this piece of crap? Before, getting your heart broken by a woman, this was the first movie that made my heart hurt! How could things go so wrong? Did the lady writer from Davey & Goliath get hired as a ghost writer?

Day 4

Christopher Folino — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 21:06:39 -0700

In Sparks the comic book news, www.catastrophiccomics.com

An ashcan, which is an eight page preview of the first issue of Sparks in full color will arrive to all retailers tomorrow, about 4,400 stores in America.

If you're friends with your local comic book store, for the love of God man, go and check out the book! And order it like the whore friend I know you are! June is almost here, and May 6th, the Day of All Days!

A comic book and a movie within just weeks of release from one another.

It's amazing I haven't left my wife and children and started hanging out with TMZ like celebs. That's my style after all!

Dave Hanson, did some shorts recently. I just want to make a movie with him and the guys after watching this. I just want to stuff words down Dave's dirty mouth and have him come up with something better, that's how we roll.

http://www.atomfilms.com/film/lonely_dave_campaign.jsp

http://www.comedy.com/video/make-a-hot-girl-laugh-the-nipple-effect

To prove I have no shame and no purpose to my blog! On the spot, this is my let's call and do an interview with some cast members of Gamers.

Let's see who picks up my call. Speaking of Dave Hanson lets try.

The phone is ringing, one ring, two rings, three rings, four rings, five rings, six rings.and voice mail. That fucker! fuck that non-funny mother fucking ass monkey! How dare he not answer my call at 8:30PM!

Okay, next star Ben Messmer, I'm dialing now, one ring, two rings, three rings, four rings, five rings, six rings and voice mail. That son of a bitch, that heartless bastard, I will kick his ass next time I see him! By the way, Ben's voice message is like 20 minutes shorter than Dave's long winded voice mail.

Next star, Scott Allen Rinker, I never have any luck with this guy!

One ring, two rings, three rings, four rings, five rings, six rings and voice mail.

His voice mail sounds like an actor that is because, Scott is an actor!

Man, it's only been 2 1/2 years where's the fucking love!

Moving on witth the calls.

Let's try Joe Nieves, one ring, two rings, three rings, four rings, five rings, six rings and voice mail! His voice mail sounds like a serial killer and tired one at best.

Damn, let's keep going, okay Kevin Sherwood, we are good friends, one ring, two rings, three rings, four rings and yes the man answers.

FOLINO: Hey Kevin? How are you?

KEVIN: I'm good.

FOLINO: What you doing?

KEVIN We're having dinner and watching TV. I'm watching the biggest loser and I'm eating chicken and rice and beans. What are you doing?

FOLINO: I'm bloggin Any words of wisdom to our three fans who read this blog still Kevin?

KEVIN SHERWOOD: Yes, since, I'm watching the biggest loser, eat healthy!

And two minutes later, Scott Allen Rinker called me back, he was being the handy-man at home.

FOLINO: How is life?

SCOTT: It goes, the house is where I'm focused at now, got family coming in!

Scott and I chit-chat like a great director to an actor. Ha!

I told Scott they airbrushed Kevin out of the front of the DVD

Scott was like "They didn't like Kevin holding corn?"

Then I reminded him it was Kevin Sherwood and the KKK outfit and he laughed and felt bad.

And to make sure I keep the blog real!

FOLINO: What did you have for dinner Scott?

SCOTT: Take out from Norms, we don't have a kitchen sink.

FOLINO: What did you eat at Norms?

SCOTT: Avavo -Gobble, I recommend it, it's quit good.

So there you have it, a hell of a blog on the spot!

Fucking free entertainment at it's worst!

Day 3 of the blog and me

Christopher Folino — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 20:14:07 -0700

Wow, third day in a row! I'm a blogging mofo!

I got to hang-out with Bill Katt the other day it was pretty cool and we talked about family and he gave advice, "small kids, small problems, big kids, big problems." I really took it to heart, any time the Greatest American Hero wants to school Folino, I am in! And when he wears the red cape, how can I not fucking listen to him seriously!

With that advice, my children are now all learning how to purge like super models. I don't big kids with big problems, fuck that! I got them all now living on two tic-tacs a day and one stick of big red, they have to share the big red though. Daddy likes his big red and he ain't into sharing!

Oh man, running out-of-shit to blog!

Did a podcast that will air soon for www.comicgeekspeak.com with Bill Katt to promote Sparks.

Not sure when it will air, we talked about Sparks and I am a marketing whore for Gamers and made sure to answer every question like this.

1. So what is Sparks the comic book about?

It's acutally called Gamers, and it's a movie coming out May 6th, and it's funnier than shit and God combined! That my friend is a whole hell of a lot of funny!

I'm going to turn all the interviews into a drinking game I swear, try and take a hit everytime I mention Gamers, I will fucking kill your kidney in just 1 hour!

Speaking of interviews, I just want to do an interview where all I do is curse and try to be freakier than Gary Busey!

Wow, look at what my dream has become.

When I was young, I wanted to be a Galactic Warrrior like Starbuck. I wanted the glory to kill robots in space and have a best friend named Apollo and when I was eight I thought that was the shit!

Now I'm fucking wanting to be freakier than Gary Busey on a pod cast.

Interesting how my dreams or so small now and sick!

By the way if Mike Smith from Australia is reading this blog, I am horrible friend and I've dressed your printer up like a man and I call him Apollo and we hang out and he thinks I'm funnier than God and Shit combined!

DAY 2 of the 24 Day Blog

Christopher Folino — Sun, 13 Apr 2008 13:31:28 -0700

I got sent this email last night from a respected journalist about Gamers.

Honest, I have no idea what the hell kind of article or where the hell they will publish this at. There is no good lead in for this Q&A section.

QUESTION: If you were on an island with the main lead cast, and had to kill and eat one of them each day to stay alive? Who would be your last pick and first pick to kill and why?

ANSWER: Kevin Sherwood, he's too pretty to eat. Hanson would be eaten by the first day, he loves spices on everything he eats, even his Cheerios and that would translate well, because, while I'm cooking him I don't think the island will have any salt or pepper. So Hanson would be some "Good eats!"

So now, I've let the cat out of the bag, as to which lead cast, I'd kill and eat first.

Love how I have to kill them first, why can't they be torn limb by limb from the plane wreck and be cooked well done to make my life easier?

God, I hope this movie gets some better press!

25 Days to Gamers Being Released

Christopher Folino — Sat, 12 Apr 2008 11:25:12 -0700

Twenty Five days unitl the release of Gamers on DVD and to celebrate or torture, whichever way you feel about my blog, I'm going to post a new blog every day until the DVD release of Gamers.

Here's my list of BEST THINGS THAT HAVE BEEN HAPPENING

Best joke of the year

Was told this morning by my oldest Twin Dominic who is 2 1/2 years old

DOMINIC: Why did the chicken cross the road?

DOMINIC'S PUNCHLINE: To get to a movie

I'm going to assume it was to Blockbuster so the chicken could rent Gamers!

Seriously, two and half years old!

I will have to teach him to ad that to the joke or threaten to kill Blue from Blues Clue again. That's the only way the little guy will "Beer me" and use his teeth open up the bottle!

BEST Concert of 2008

Was going to see Springsteen at the Pond in Anaheim with my two old brothers Michael and Steven. I've seen Bruce about 30 times and we had amazing seats, never had such great seats. And when my two brothers get together they're some funny mother fuckers. A magical night all around.

Check out Bruce and Tom Morello from Rage Against Machine, it was a highlight

http://youtube.com/watch?v=dJT1EdKRF2g&feature=related

BEST CD

And to plug my brother Steven's band, The Silver Devil Band, I got to say I'm impressed with these guys. They did covers and Steven is wicked sick, yo on guitar! Word. Wow, look at me throw down with the language.

http://www.myspace.com/silverdevilband

BEST AND WORST WORK DAY

I got to direct Gary Busey for a day.

All I can say is that thanks God I knew William Katt, that was the only thing that saved me from Gary not wanting to do the videos

Here's a link of the videos we created for a new video game.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=seuh5iAW2nc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQdTcwGtcW4&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=St9MEtTM6Sw&feature=related

BEST COMIC BOOK TO GET THIS YEAR

www.catastrophiccomics.com

Get it at your local comic book store in June!

Free Blockbuster rental for a month and now you can reserve Gamers to rent!

Christopher Folino — Sun, 30 Mar 2008 17:23:17 -0700

Here is the deal of the century! I just saw this on the front page of Yahoo! Get Blockbuster for free for a month!

And best of all guess what movie just made it into Blockbuster? That's right Gamers!

So, if you want to help us increase our orders at Blockbuster, place Gamers on the Que!

https://www.blockbuster.com/signup/s/reg/p.26715/pc.hp1m999cart/c.oneMonthFreeFamilyAnim/r./

Here's the link for Gamers on Blockbuster!

http://www.blockbuster.com/catalog/movieDetails/390444

You can also do this at Netflix, however, there is no free movie rental for a month!

http://www.netflix.com/Movie/Gamers/70091896

Again, how cool is this! May 6th Baby!

Rent it, own it, please help at least Que it!

Come see the next project -Coming out in June called Sparks

Christopher Folino — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:15:24 -0700

http://catastrophiccomics.com/index.html

The next project for me is writing William Katt's (Greatest American Hero) launch title for his venture into comic books called "Sparks."

The book comes out in June, it's 32 pages, full color, and it's eight complete books.

The first six pages are up of issue 1 are up for you to read!

Very excited!

Gary Gygax

Christopher Folino — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 20:04:17 -0800

The creator of Dungeons and Dragons, Gary Gygax died today

He's someone who I always wanted to meet and thank for creating the one thing that had more influence on me than most of my school teachers and the bible combined and that was "Dungeons and Dragons"

I went to a Catholic grade school and it was there I got hooked during recess.

Wizards, Clerics and Thieves, oh my God, how cool was that when your eight and it's before video games took over the youth and even before VHS even!

The creativity and joy this brought to me as a kid and as a young adult, man, I found myself wanting to write stories after creating dungeons for the game.

Serious, we grew up in El Monte, CA and we had no money, so this was "the entertainment" we had and it was all we needed. And we dreamed of going to Lake Geneva and playing D&D with Gary Gygax, hell, he was the "Man" and his dungeons were awesome!

From the age of eight to the age of thirty, Dungeons and Dragons was a huge part of my life and when it was time to make the first movie, I wrote about what I knew.

That's my life story up there, I'm not a fucking jock with a trust fund" making fun of "Gamers" that's pretty much a huge part of my life from my childhood. Each of those characters, I can relate too, very well in fact! That whole Reese scene calling about his character dying, that's not writing folks, that's living what you write!

When we went ahead and started the ball on making Gamers, we contacted Wizards of the Coast and I swear to God, they were no help and even at one point the main guy said "You know there's a movie being made just like this?"

I told him "Bullshit, if there is, then we will go to court, because, this is based on my life story, nobody was making a film from the angle we did."

We then contacted Gary's guys and we were so close to getting his approval, however, Gary's guys were concern the movie made fun of "Gamers" and that the script had a lot of scenes which didn't put Gamers in a positive light.

His guys were cool, and it just didn't work out, we didn't want to take anything out of the movie, even if it would of mean't we could get Gary's blessing.

In the end we had to do what we felt right and Gary had a reputation and an amazing body of work he needed to protect. And who can blame him? We were just a bunch of idiots with a bank loan, credit cards and a dream.

But, look at Gary's influence on video games, RPG games owe a lot to the man.

And I will always be thankful for his amazing creation, without it, I would of had a much different life and I was such a bad speller and people gave me shit for it, that I don't think I would of done creative writing if it wasn't for D&D.

Because, nobody gave a shit if the DM could spell, it was all about the dungeon and creating hours of non-stop fun and action.

Other than Springsteen, I can't think of another person who influenced me as much that wasn't related or a friend.

Gary Gygax I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your imagination, without it there would be no "Gamers" and I can't even imagine my life without Dungeons and Dragons.

It was so influential and so worth every hour dreaming up stories.

So Viva La Gary Gygax! We will find a way to properly honor him.

And I want to thank everyone who was so kind to send the viral videos and also post videos on their site and to all the folks who went onto IMDB and reviewed the film.

Thank you, it means the world to us all and I have no clue what is going to happen on May 6th with the release, but, I do know whatever happens we made some amazing friends who have gone above and beyond to help us!

New Viral Video for Gamers The Movie

Christopher Folino — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 16:04:51 -0800

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmgk09MLS-k

New Review of Gamers!

Christopher Folino — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 18:05:13 -0800

This morning, we got sent a review of all reviews for the movie.

It's funny, because, I got to remember there is a team now over at Monterey Media that are working to get the DVD for May 6th, so it's like were starting all over again with reviews, which is cool!

And good lord this is like the nicest review ever for Gamers, serious, my own dead mother couldn't of written anything nicer. It's so cool, as you work your day job and take care of the family, there's that little glimmer of hope that Gamers will reach a wider audience and that we may be able to do another film.

Man, the second this bad boy becomes available on the cue for Netflix, I'm emailing everyone, we really need to sale 40,000 units to get our money back, so I have no problem whoring myself out and telling everyone to at least rent the damn thing!

So here now is the new review of Gamers, which gave me a big head for ten minutes untl I had to go back and change the oil in the french fries at my work :)

http://www.angelfire.com/pq/moviereviews/page328.html

Gamers has a release date and is posted on Monterey Media

Christopher Folino — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 06:49:35 -0800

Look we are official and a date of May 6th 2008 is set for a release date...sweet!

http://montereymedia.com/independent/gamers.html

The box art isn't changing on the front, it appears they will be adding some more press quotes though!

It's pretty, pretty good!

May 6th, let's see what else is coming out in May?

Some movie with a dude named Indy who has a whip in movie theatre...we can take him!

Monterey Media included our awards on the sale page!

A little shout out to www.bumscorner.com and Gen Con Yo!

Also, what historical things have happened on May 6th that will pale in comparrion to the release of Gamers on DVD.

May 6th 1937 The Hindenberg airship catches fire and is destroyed while in the USA

(Well, that's interesting and we don't have scenes on the Hindenberg...thank God, I cut that out of the budget)

Birthdays on May 6th-Not bad at all!

1856: Sigmund Freud, Austrian psychologist

1895: Rudolph Valentino, Silent film star

1915: Orson Wells, American Actor

So, now all we got to do is sale a few!

I will try and find out the price list for the stores!

Update & Thanks

Christopher Folino — Sat, 05 Jan 2008 04:50:04 -0800

With our new distribution deal with Monterey Media, www.montereymedia.com

As of today, we will not be selling the DVD on our website.

You can still buy T-Shirts and the amazing sound track though!

Monterey Media will be woking to get Gamers released sometime in mid 2008 and the plan of course is to make it available for purchase and rental at Blockbuster, Netflix, Bestbuy and everywhere else.

Again, we thank everyone who has been so supportive of the film and we are so grateful to our amazing cast & crew, co-workers, the press (We can't thank the folks enough who gave us a shot that honestly helped to impress Monterey Media to sign us), Gen Con, M.U.F.F., Indie Film Nation, our friends online because of "Gamers" and of course, Fernando Velloso, Roberto Blasini, Kevin Sherwood, Frank Szick, Tom Hite, Dave Colacioppo, Melissa Rivas, Jennifer Stechman, Meredith Zealy, Manuel Silva, Dave Hanson, Ben Messmer, Scott Allen Rinker, Kevin Kirkpatrick, Joe Nivas, Niko Posey,William Katt,Michael Bell, John Gaudiosi,Jason Driver, Chuck, Niki, Michael Smith, Rose Folino, Glen Reynolds, Scott Mansfield, Jere Rae-Mansfield, and Monterey Media.

And last, but not least! A huge |"special thanks" to Alison Bradley from Wacky Puppy at wackypuppy.com for creating our website. She rocks! She's cool and she's kind!

It's a dream come true to make a movie, but, it's even cooler that people will be able to rent or buy our movie in a store!

And lastly! Yeah! No more gambling on football to pay our bank loan!

Gamers signs Distribution Deal With Monterey Media -Movie to come out in 2008!

Christopher Folino — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 21:23:55 -0800

Tonight at 4PM we inked a deal with Monterey Media www.montereymedia.com

to distribute Gamers in the U.S. and Canada and On Demand TV.

It's been a hell of a long road to get here and to find a distribution company that we trust and respect.

It's really frickin exciting and we can't thank everyone enough for all the love and support you have given us to make this day a reality.

On behalf of executive producers Fernando, Kevin, Tito and myself we thank you a million times over.

The plan is to get the movie out in May 2008 to Blockbuster, Best Buy, Netflix and everywhere else.

More details to arrive as the ship day comes closer.

Again thank you.

Best Regards,

Chris

Big News Regarding Gamers in the next 48 hours

Christopher Folino — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 21:38:42 -0800

We will have "BIG NEWS" Regarding Gamers The Movie in the next 48 Hours or less.

Monday Morning Blog

Christopher Folino — Mon, 10 Dec 2007 04:40:36 -0800

About two weeks ago, I got to work with the "great" Roberto Blasini (DP of Gamers) and the "normal" Kevin Sherwood (lead actor, and boom operator in Gamers) on a video shoot in Chicago for a video game documentary.

We had to drive about an hour and a half drive from the airport to a suburb and I brought a copy of Gamers in case I ran into either Siskel, Ebert, or Roper.

(Still offensive after all these years)

If I met Siskel (Whose dead), then for sure I knew he could get us a "sweet distribution deal", because, nobody where he's at has seen the movie, and they might use it for "Training Purposes" to help save people's souls or after years of living with "God " and being "beyond joyous", they might want to sneak in a dirty film and a cigarette.

Yes, this is how my mind thinks.

(Man it's like watching the same magic trick every day)

Serious? How boring is heaven? I remember the nun who in Catholic School told us that "You don't need your family in heaven, because, you'll receive God's love 24/7 and that you'll be in a state of complete happiness."

Now, at the age of eight, my reference of "complete happiness" was being the red batter in my Intellivision Major League Baseball game and perhaps drinking a cold Pepsi with some Lampost Pizza (Still, not a bad idea of what heaven should be)

(Oh, how I love thee)

I digress, back to the story, now if I ran into Ebert (Not dead) I'd tell him to watch "Gamers" because, it would "cure" his cancer...I know that's horrible to say, but, what if the treatment kicked in really good that day while he was watching the movie, I'd be fucking in! Every week, that son-of-a-bitch would end his show with like three thumbs up of "Gamers"

Sure, the guilt of only selling the movie to cancer patience would get to me, but, I'd only do it until the bank loan was paid off, then I'd like donate half the money to cancer research and the other half to making women even hotter! That's right Girls gone hotter! That's the Folino touch...all those woman I shot in those spots recently were sheman before I got ahold of them.

And for some reason I want to punch Roper (Should be dead) with a copy of Gamers, I don't like him one bit...I think he killed Siskel the same way that Russian spy died recently, that's the rumor I'm starting. "The sucks all on you Roper!" Enjoying the show without Ebert? You talentless fuck? The show should be renamed "Siskel, Ebert and who really fucking cares about that other guy!"

Now, of course, as luck would have it, I ran into nobody...except 20 degrees below weather with some damn wind chill.

Fuck, how do you people do it? Serious, it got me to wonder, now if you eat ice cream in really cold weather and if you get a brain freeze do you die? Serious, your body has got to be like "Bitch, why am I in the cold? And what the hell do you think your doing eating ice cream...No, No, Shanaynay! Suck on this brain aneurysm!

That's how my brain thinks.

He call me "Shanaynay", we are "tight" like that.

(By the way, the name Shanaynay is funny, however, the name Martin Lawrence is not)

Now, the "great" Roberto Blasini and the "not so great, but still attractive" Kevin Sherwood and I listened to both commentary tracks for Gamers on the drive up and the drive back.

Now, it's been a year, since I've watched the movie, the last time I was drunk at the Comedy club that Dave Hanson use to work at. Before, he became "Mr. Wendys".

I can't bring myself to watch the film again, but, then again I'm not one for "repeat viewings" of anything. Not even my favorite midget porn...I have "new videos" bused in every night. (The short bus of course)

But, it did leave me with a desire to do another commentary for a movie.

However, not my own movie.

I figure, I'll just throw my services out there to any film that wants me to bring "THE MAGIC" to their commentary.

I know the new Batman movie is coming out and I'm offering my skills to Christopher Nolan. I will sit in and make a few funny remarks to liven things up a bit, keep it from being "too dark."

I will also bring Fernando Velloso, who did the best commentary in Gamers.

So, there, it's out there.

Update on things

William Katt is starting a new comic book company called Catastrophic Comics in early to mid 2008, I'm co-writing a comic book with him called "Mythology Wars" and he's been kind enough to publish another story I wrote called "Sparks."

It's a six issue comic book, 24 pages each, it's being drawn by JM Ringuet. Two complete comic books have been done. And I can tell you right now, for my services, because, I am "Expensive", I negoiated the rights to advertise "Gamers" in both books.

I am a whore like that...that's how my "whore heart" thinks.

And when you read the stories, I plug the movie in as much as I can in the background. And my children, God, I think all my kids are named after the main characters, and man my wife is going to be pissed when I kill one of them off in the book. I can't wait for that therapy bill when the kid's grow up and ask "Dad, you didn't love me as much as my brother and sister, you killed me off in the comic book first! Why dad?"

That's how I roll -Pre-medidated "Worse Father of the century!"

My life after Gamers

Christopher Folino — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 01:15:53 -0800

Let's see... I directed a TV spot featuring two attractive women in bikinis, one coming out of a pool and then rubbing her friend down with sun tan lotion. This spot alone should get me into heaven. That's if, God is a twelve year old boy who doesn't have access to the internet or cinemax.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=pP1rKQBQDZk

And now, I give you two Maxim Models washing each other in even shorter bikinis!

I am a giver. I am Santa and I am living proof to all of who watched Gamers and called it homoerotic porn, that I can at least...ah...easily make straight porn?

Watch, and thank me for bringing joy to boys and men of all ages!

Viva La Folino!

view here

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=23530093

or view here

http://media.wii.ign.com/media/947/947105/vids_1.html

Bindeez choses "Gamers" the movie as perfect partner!

Christopher Folino — Mon, 12 Nov 2007 05:04:05 -0800

Among all the American movies ever made, the makers of Bindeez have chosen "Gamers" to partner with them for a special "date night" promotion for all their former customers.

So, if you're over the age of 18 and you thought the Government banned your consumer power to purchase the over-the-counter-date-rape drug GHB in children's toys! Think again! They're selling it online now!

"Gamers: The Movie: was chosen by Bindeez, the makers of Aqua Dots, to team up for that "Special GHB date night" movie!

Forgive me for bragging, here's a direct quote from the CEO of Bindeez " We chose Gamers, for it's natural ability to put woman to sleep before the opening credits," and "Really, who the fucking hell would want to stay awake for 87 minutes to watch a movie about five guys roll playing". Folks, you JUST CAN'T buy press like that!

So please don't miss out on this amazing offer!

www.buybindeezdirectandgetfuckedupamericanmoviefree.com

Act now and you'll get a copy of that sleeper hit "Gamers" with your choice of two colorful "GHB laced" Aqua Dot beeds all for the amazing price of $19.99

But wait, there's more, If you act now Bindeez will throw in a free Dora The Explorer figurine that will add more lead toxicans which cause long term coma, so you can keep your special "GHB friend" asleep longer!

Dora says "Gracias Bindeez!" I keep my Aqua Dots and my copy of Gamers in my backpack...backpack!" Can you say nap time Amigo?"

The Writers Strike doesn't effect this blog, only good taste and time.

Good lord...not even sure if that was funny. I started off thinking I wanted to send a Christmas gift to the wonderful folks in China who make all those fucked up toys, then I thought to myself...boring! And before my moral compass could object, I wrote this blog! Yeah, my dead mom would be so proud.

So hey, for all ten of you who own Gamers, you no longer have to prove it's a real movie that nobody has ever heard of! And nope, I didn't post it!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gamers:_The_Movie

Update on the movie? Well if he's going to write about GHB and the movie in the same blog, then...ah...nevermind.