|
|
Thursday, August 31
Reality Bites...more like throws up.
by
Christopher Folino
on Thu 31 Aug 2006 08:55 AM PDT
Sometimes you try really hard to be write something clever for a blog, then other times, like today you go with reality, hoping it doesn’t bite.
MY NIGHTLIFE
People ask me all the time (So, not true) Chris? How does a cult filmmaker (Nobody other me calls me that) like yourself spend your time? (Not a single person has ever asked) Do you hang-out with Dave Hanson and go to nude lesbian amputee midget bars? Or do you kick-it with Scott Allen Rinker and smoke all night and discuss Nietzsche and Snapple?
Nope, I usually come home around 7:30PM, and then come home in time to hang-out with 2 ½ feet of fun! Yes, I love little people, but, I have twin boys.
My wife, Rose and I split the twins at night, I watch “Destructo” the oldest and she watches “Handsome”. Now, “Destructo” is good looking also, he’s just more likely to lose those good lucks from jumping off couches, roofs, and tall people, the boy simply has “no fear” or as I like to call it, “No sense of physics yet.” “Handsome” is mellow and really understand at a young age, he’s going to get a lot of “play, as long as he doesn’t do anything to his face. Destructo is a mini-Evil Knievel but, prefers not to wear a helmet.
So, Destructo, “christened” me last night, I’m not talking spit-up with a little milk, oh no, I’m talking “Linda Blair Exorcist style” right on my face.
I just fed him a bottle of milk, to get him to sleep last night, and as I was raising him up over my shoulder for a “manly burb”, I hear a slight moan, so I stop him and make eye contact to investigate the moan, and then before I could say “Hey wife!” My face was covered with my son’s dinner, his snack, his lunch, a Bratz toy he swallowed earlier in the day, parts from the washing machine.
After it was all done, the boy just smiled at me and then he tried to pick some of the food off my face to eat. I’m going to work on that bit of etiquette before he goes on prom in sixteen years.
Speaking of Dave Hanson, he wrote a funny blog on MySpace today, he’s incapable of writing anything funny when he’s a guest on my blog…however, he shines just fine on his own blog.
Here’s the link to his MySpace page and then you can read his blog. If you like the “Vagina Monologues” you love his blog.
http://www.myspace.com/funnydave
Wednesday, August 30
Bad Lit reviews "Gamers" by Mike Everleth
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 30 Aug 2006 11:07 AM PDT
http://www.badlit.com/?p=394
Review by Mike Everleth, from www.badlit.com
I’ve never understood the appeal of role-playing games like “Dungeons & Dragons.” That may be because I’m primarily a visual person. My two big passions in life (after my wife) are two forms of visual storytelling: Movies and comic books. So I don’t get the concept of sitting around pretending you’re walking around a dungeon fighting monsters. If I want that kind of experience I’ll just go play a video game.
And that’s the most shocking thing about Christopher Folino’s debut feature, Gamers, finding out that there are people out there who still play role-playing games (RPGs). I thought the whole “Dungeons & Dragons” phenomenon fizzled out after that crappy Tom Hanks TV-movie Mazes and Monsters in 1982. I further thought that people into those kinds of things just played video games like Halo and WarCraft today. But I was completely wrong.
Gamers is a mockumentary about four lifelong friends and one wannabe who, as a group, attempt to set the record for playing the most hours of the fantasy role-playing game “Demons, Nymphs and Dragons.” While making fun of RPG nerds is like shooting fish in a barrel, Folino keeps things fresh and interesting by rarely ever showing the quintet playing their favorite game. The majority of the film is about the prepartion for the world-record breaking session, not the actual session itself.
Folino knows that just watching a bunch of dorks pretend to play a game would get boring real quick, so he keeps the film away from the gaming table as much as possible and works in some great visual gags. He also does a fairly good job with making the main five characters seem like real people rather than caricatures. The only exception is Reese, the stereotypical uber-geek who only seems to exist in movies and not real life.
While the other four leads are suitably interesting and complex to carry our interest through the film, Gamers does suffer a little bit by not having a strong central character. The focus of the movie is ostensibly the gamer Gordon, a Public Access TV producer who lives at home with his parents — a couple of swingers played with great gusto by John Heard and Beverly D’Angelo. A vague plot is introduced around halfway into the film concerning Gordon hooking up with an old high school (almost) flame and his growing awareness about the pathetic-ness of his and his friends’ lives.
But this isn’t a movie really about the story, it’s about the jokes. Folino keeps them good-natured and avoids any mean-spirited attacks against his game players. Some of the running gags get a little strained, such as a recurring “pagan baby” and Paul’s inability to curse. But for the most part they succeed even when they’re outlandishly unbelievable, like Kevin’s “imperial wizard” costume that eventually ties in very cleverly with a radio trivia contest gag. I also really liked Kevin’s personalized songs for children and found myself singing the chorus to “Wake Up, Dick” for the rest of the day.
Folino also gets good mileage out of his celebrity guest stars. The aforemented Heard and D’Angelo appear in a couple of terrific scenes, while Kelly LeBrock really plays up her sexpot image in a great flashback and William Katt appears as Reese’s boss in an aging hippie outfit that renders the actor completely unrecognizable. (I knew Katt was in the film, but I didn’t know which character he played until reading the end credits.)
Gamers is an amiable, likeable — and funny — film that doesn’t demand the audience to be into gaming to enjoy.
Click here to buy Gamers on DVD!
State Of Things For Wednesday
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 30 Aug 2006 04:25 AM PDT
My five year daughter starts Kindergarten today, new school, new teacher, she's a bit on the shy side...so I tease her. She's got a warped sense of humor though. She keeps telling me that she "can't wait for her fish to die", so she can flush it down the toilet. And then, the other day there was a dead bird near the side gate of the house and I got some trash bag and threw it away. She looked at me and stated "I would have made dead bird soup." I'm going to mess with her tonight and make soup and while she's eating it, Im going to state "Enjoying the soup? I took your advice, Bon appetite!" I'm going to video tape that moment.
My daughter and I talked last night about marketing ideas for the movie, I figured, I've actually wasted my time listening to a former film festival director who gave me "expensive bullshit advice", why not ask a five year old? It's free! She got all animated and was like "Use the parrot on a T-Shirt. he's funny, you're not so funny! I like the parrot! You could make parrot soup!" She didn't say the soup line, however, I could see it in her eyes! Hey look! I'm raising a little female version of John Mark Karr.
GETTING THE MOVIE INTO STORES
We are knocking on doors, sending thousands of emails, it's a long process. It's just a matter of time. If you got a favorite store you rent from, send me their email at christopherfolino@hotmail.com. We are going to win this battle, one store, one comic book shop at a time. That loan will be paid and someday we will make another movie.Maybe about parrots! We waited 23 years to do this one, we know how to wait.
BANNERS
We are creating animated banners and will have them up soon.
RETRO GOD
Dave Hanson and I got to hang-out last Saturday Night the "Intellivision party" always fun to see the "Hanson man". We got such a talented cast for our movie, serious, everybody is awesome! And Nikko and Zealy are funny ladies! It's only a matter of time, before, none of the cast, returns my calls.
It's a shame I can't challenge a film distribution company to a game of Intellivision's Major League Baseball.
I swear, I'd put up the rights to the movie for a shot to get the film on every screen in the world or even ten screens. That's how much "I rule at that game!" I requested from Keith, the guy who now owns Intellivision Lives, the cell number of David Rolfe, the programmer of the game.
My other favorite game, is the hand-held football game by Mattel and guess who created that? David Rolfe! Though, I prefer now the Coleco Head-to-Head version, just in case, I can someday meet a friend who will want to challenge me!
So David Rolfe is a legend! I want to buy this guy a pony and I want to play him a game!
I swear to God, I'm going to either do a sequel to "Gamers" or do a TV series, just so I can create a segment around the character playing Intellivision Major League Baseball . It's the greatest game ever!
They shipped out with 1,085,700 copies of the game! Where are you bitches?
I will destroy all of you! So what if the game came out in 1980! Man Up! Yer Out!
Link to learn more about the man God that is David Rolfe!
http://www.digitpress.com/archives/interview_rolfe.htm
I got to go make some soup and play some Intellivsion MLB!
Tuesday, August 29
Review of "Gamers" by Ed Fear
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 29 Aug 2006 08:08 PM PDT
This cat bought a copy and posted his review, I found it by accident tonight.
Thanks Ed, this is pretty cool!
Review by Ed Fear
http://live-for-movies.blogspot.com/
I’m not sure what’s worse: being a gamer (albeit in high school), or watching a movie about gamers carrying their pastime well into adulthood.
And we’re not talking videogames, board games, card games, or even paintball (although it does make an appearance in the film). Dungeons and Dragons, baby: The DM Guide, Monster Manuals, collections of dice and all the accoutrements of late-night indoors geekdom.
The saving graces of this film are two-fold: first, it pulls no punches in making the lead characters out to be the geekiest of the geeks, the loser-ists of the losers, and the epitomes of pathetic-ness. Setting up the pecking order of this motley crew results in some of the cruelest and funniest film moments you’re likely to see. And very few of the situations are as over-the-top as a National Lampoon movie. These are things you’d do to your best friends, and dream of doing to your worst enemy.
The second saving grace, and frankly the most impressive bit of the execution of this movie is the cast. The main characters come across as unknowns until you read their bios and realize, "Yeah, I have seen that guy before." But go back up and look at the guest stars. Big names. Small picture. And great performances of not-too-over-the-top characters.
As much as I want to pan this film and make fun of it, I just can’t. It’s self-deprecating all on its own. The main problem is finding it. As of tonight, it’s still not available through NetFlix, so you’ve either really got to search, or just order it from the creators online (http://www.gamers-themovie.com/sstore.htm).
Coolness: Filmed in the next town over from me. Well, that’s cool to me!
Dorkness: Because this film is an homage to dorkness, this is pretty much not applicable.
Bottom line: While this doesn’t make me pine for the good old days of all-night D&D parties, I do miss those friends from back in the day. And everyone needs a Reese.
posted by Edd Fear
"Got Nex"t Review of "Gamers" by Joseph Luster
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 29 Aug 2006 04:52 PM PDT
Got Next Review "Gamers" by Joseph Luster
http://www.got-next.com/features_read.php?id=390
Gamers is pretty surprising. I honestly don't expect much from mockumentaries lampooning staples of nerd-dom, especially when the subject of which is one that I'm really not all that familiar with. I've never played a table-top RPG in my life, mostly due to the fact that I've never had any friends that were into the hobby... and they're also so nerdy that it's almost crippling.
That's exactly the topic at hand in Gamers, a fun flick that follows a group of nerd caricatures documentary style as they prepare to break the world record for role playing over 74,568 hours. That's right, they've been playing the same game (DND… not what you're thinking. It stands for Demons, Nymphs & Dragons, but I think you get the parallels here) for the past 23 years. Sound like you and your friends? Right.
As the camera crew follows around each member of the group, both together and individually, leading up to the big day, the movie is peppered with flashbacks and allusions to their history as friends and as a gaming crew. There are a lot of laughs in Gamers, and it's not entirely dependent on the audience being "in on the joke," as far as the role playing references are concerned. Sure, there's a lot of 20-sided jargon, but it's obvious that the intended audience sweeps out wider than the inner circle depicted here.
The movie's not nearly as mean as the packaging would have you believe. The characters therein are extreme exaggerations that even the most grizzly of basement-dwelling spellcasters can chuckle at. From the kid-song-singing oblivious nature of the group's leader to their most recent and nerdiest recruit, Reese, these cats are the prototype for the dead-end job loser. Something like this is even harder to pull off cast-wise, but the mark is hit for the most part, with a collection of actors that seem genuinely nerdy, as if dragging them off set would do nothing to cool the flames of fandom. It's also worth mentioning that, aside from the main cast of dorks, John Heard and Beverly D'Angelo appear frequently, and with a majority of the laughs, as Gordon's apathetically disappointed parents.
Most importantly, it looks like the entire cast and crew had a blast making it. Both the film credits and the special features on the disc are full of scenes that didn't make it in the movie itself, and the self-aware, retarded nature of the film is reflected in the overall execution. Despite the fact that some of the gags are hit or miss, most anyone will find something to laugh out loud about in Gamers. Writer and director Christopher Folino's debut is definitely a successful one, and it's going to be interesting to see what comes from his camp next.
Let's be honest, though. Any movie that opens with "Everybody's Workin' for the Weekend" has a place somewhere in my heart.
DVD Features: This disc is a pretty healthy one. There are commentaries from the cast and crew, as well as multiple cast interviews and a handful of deleted scenes to dig through. Picture and sound-wise, this is a solid release from Sideshow of a flick that will definitely own a spot on many cult film fan's shelves in the future.
24 the cartoon series..Jack is one pissed off kid
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 29 Aug 2006 07:53 AM PDT
Just for the hell of it, here now are some one liner’s for headline news stories around the world.
Bush remembers victims of Katrina…only the white ones
Tropical Storm Ernesto takes aim at U.S…illegal find new way to cross border.
Kevin Federline to appear on “CSI”…this is why terrorist hate us.
In other news today, the Emmy Award winning show ”24” is slated to become a cartoon show on Fox fall 2007.
“We know that the world loves seeing Jack Bauer fight terrorist! And now, they’ll get see Jack Bauer, middle school student take on drug dealers, evil pimps, and gang-bangers!” commented, the vice president of children’s programming for Fox, Lance Amater.
The cartoon show will also add some animal friends like a Panda named “Kiki” who will help provided Jack with INTEL and a raccoon named “T.O” who can makes explosives out of anything on McDonald’s Happy Kid’s menu.
Things to do while you’re in Honolulu
- Surf
- Reenact the Brady Bunch episode where they get cursed in Hawaii
- And go buy “Gamers the movie” at Gecko Books & Comics
Gecko Books & Comic –Owner: Ted Mays
www.hawaiibid.com/geckobooks/
Phone: (808) 732-1292
Toll Free: 1-800-81GECKO
E-mail: geckobooks@aol.com
Address:<삅♴䖋诼ᡈ燿（ၵｓᱰ䶋儈䇨?㯿࿃濾>3613 Waialae Ave.Honolulu, Hawaii96816
Hours:
Daily: 9am - 9pm
DVD shipment to arrive this week at Gecko Books & Comic.
Monday, August 28
My Tivo is magically connected to the Emmy Judges
by
Christopher Folino
on Mon 28 Aug 2006 01:45 AM PDT
So first off, my Tivo is magically connected to the “Emmy judges” this year and all I have to say is “Thank God” maybe, if we can somehow get “Gamers” onto my Tivo, the movie will catch on too? Woo, whose been spending too much time in the meth lab “sampling” instead of working now, other than my five year old “slacker, of a daughter?
Here now, is a list of which TV shows I record on my Tivo, please understand, I take this “To Record” list very serious, a lot of my life has been dedicated to making sure that what I record is “God like” and that Tivo doesn’t come back to me on it’s “Suggestion List” with “Yes Dear” that suggestion my friend, is not “acceptable”.
I have spent more time picking out which shows to tape on my Tivo, than naming my three children, which by the way are named Tivo, Devo, and Treo.
If God told me today, that I’d be a shoe-in to get into heaven, “If only I just gave up my Tivo.” I’d have to know how long I have left on this earth and if heaven is a little more than receiving “divine knowledge” and just sitting around with God, smiling and feeling complete, kind of like I drank the purple Kool-Aid.
Serious God, better be one interesting being, I’m talking “Dave Attell funny” and hot looking at the same time! It, better be able to do some “extreme magic tricks! Like pull Jimmy Hoffa out of his ass and an edible “Cherry Pop Tart” at the same time!
God, better be “Family Guy”, “HBO”, “John Stewart”, “Dungeons and Dragons”
, “Anna Nicole Smith (When she was Guess Jeans model and a mute) “Madden Football Franchise Mode” and “chocolate” all wrapped into one…otherwise, I’m not dying.
Now, before I reveal my amazing Tivo “To Do List”, try and guess which three shows, aren’t mine from it? I’ll admit and proudly, that I watch "Drake and Josh", it’s the only thing my daughter and I like to spend together, while we share a case of “Pabst Blue Ribbon” For every beer she drinks, that’s just another ribbon she can put on her resume when she grows up. By the way, Pabst Blue Ribbon was selected America's Best Beer in 1893. What the hell were our great-grandparents drinking back then? Paint thinner?
My Tivo “To List” (What a hell of a blog, I’ve written today, with a war going on and gas prices at 7000 dollars a gallon, I’m talking about my Tivo! I am Paris Hilton selfish today…that’s hot!)
The Christopher Folino’s Tivo “To Do List”
- 24
- Curb Your Enthusiasm
- The Office
- Family Guy
- Entourage
- The Daily Show
- The Colbert Report
- It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia
- Bratz
- Scrapbooking
- Drake and Josh
- The Sopranos
- Zoey 101
- The Office (The original show)
- Extras
- American Dad
And in my bedroom, I have a larger Tivo, because, the bedroom is where you need things to be ‘larger”, Yeah Baby!
- The Shield
- Rescue Me
If you want to email me a show, other than Joe Nieves baby “Day Break” and whenever, Dave Hanson and Scott Allen Rinker are on “Nice breasts lady, who whispers to Ghosts” Go ahead! And if you want to know why the TV show, “Lost” isn’t on my Tivo, it’s because, I just watch the season finale. I won’t waste another year of my life suffering through flashbacks, and more new characters to deal with.
Okay, now I end this blog with a poem by super human, Nikki Zalewski. All I have to say is that if any of you reading this blog and are thinking of being our next MYSPACE “Best Friend” you’re fucked! Serious, this woman got us a deal to sell directly to her comic book store and she actually bought the movie and didn’t sell it on EBAY, which, by the way, whoever bought the movie for like $17.99 and paid $7.50 for shipping, you’re an idiot! Serious, she’s like the “Tiger Woods” of “best friends” I feel complete and spoiled!
Look, she wrote a poem about the movie! I can’t even get my daughter to draw me a picture of daddy working in his secret “money making lab” But Nikki? She went ahead and wrote us a poem! My daughter is on notice, she may be replaced very soon unless she “Girl’s Up!”
"Gamers the poem"
By: Nikki Zalewski
It was a tale of gallant men
Paul held the fiercest obsession
Gordo just wanted the streak to end
We have Kevin, the almighty dungeon lord
Fernando rounded out our group of four
I guess I should also mention Reese
Whose clerics died with the greatest of ease
Twenty three years they sat and played
An RPG, Roberto Blasini had made
Sacrificed time, relationships, and their sanity
Figuring it was all for the good of humanity
This game seemed to run their lives
Would they have what it takes to survive?
In the end it turned out to be a sham
Paul did his best to follow the plan
He lied, cheated, and deceived
These men that did their best to achieve
Our story ends in paintball alley
With Paul swearing up a storm
Like a sailor on shore leave
I suggest you see this all for yourself
This movie that sits proudly upon my shelf
That ladies and gentlemen is poetry, fuck Emily Dickinson, E.E. Cummings, Walt Whitman and The Fresh Prince.
Now, I got to go, I got some "Bratz" viewing to catch-up on...so good day to you.
Sunday, August 27
“Actors and Agents who turned down roles"
by
Christopher Folino
on Sun 27 Aug 2006 07:23 AM PDT
“Actors and Agents who turned down roles"
"Best of Blog" every Sunday -Here's a sad and true story.
My favorite story of an agent who turned down a role in "Gamers" is Gary Coleman's agent.
The guy took forever to get back to us and then said it "wasn't the right material for Gary."
Mind you, I kind of screwed up, the part was for the character of the little person and being oh so creative I called the character Little person, even after we submitted the lines to Gary's agent.
By the way, I didn't bother naming any characters anything special. Hell, John Heard plays Gordon's dad. Beverly is Gordon's mom. And Kelly is Angela's mom. And then William Katt is Reese's boss. Isn't that creative? I blame the fact on that I was saving up all the good names for my twin boys. Tu-Pac and Biggie.
Okay, back to Gary's agent who said “It wasn't the right material.” “The right material?” Jesus Christ! This is after the God's of Cinema blessed us with getting real actors like John Heard, Beverly D'Angelo, William Katt, and Kelly LeBrock to appear in a God Damn Ultra Low Budget Indie film!
I had to throw away my boot leg VHS copy of the Kid with the 200 I.Q. after that one.
Here's another story, I'm sure Michelle the casting director will love me for this. I kind of doubt she reads the blog here, so this will be a test.
I was a huge fan of Jay Mohr's show called Action. Super fan of the show, it should of found a home on HBO and stayed there. Needless to say there were two people from the show Action I wanted to cast.
One was for a lead and the other was for a smaller part.
One of the guy's agent was such a prick that he told us "His actor wasn't interested in a project where the camera rental house was going to get paid more than the talent. Ha,Ha! We got the gear for free buddy!
The other actor's agent put us off for a month, and the day after we casted the part, the guy calls and says "We'll do it." And we said no.
If we get into a film festival, one that isn't like The El Monte Film Festival, my home town which I would hope would let me win. I swear I may drunk call all these frickin actors and “Go hey buddy, how was the part on that Disney Dog movie that's been re-done every seven years?”
And don't even get me started on the wonderful folks at The Wizards of the Coast.
I got a tattoo of a phoenix on my arm back in 1997. It was from the Fiend Folio. I changed the face a bit to make it look less gay. I used an Eagles face. I felt a connection with D&D and Gary Gygax, even though my true reason for getting the tat, was because I was working for Home Depot Television and I got the tat to promise myself that someday I would do a movie. I was a little tired of getting my ass chewed out at HDTV for being the only guy using a jib to get nice footage from the stores.
So, hell I was all about fate and destiny. Shit, watching “Empire Strikes Back” will do that to you. I thought I was a lock for getting permission to use the Dungeons and Dragons name. We were so close, however, they pulled it. They got a partnership with somebody big to a do movie about a group of guys who play D&D in a hobby shop.
I still have no idea what or who is part of that film, but, Christ if that didn't happen the same week our script got out to the web for rehearsals. Strange timing? So that's why we had to call the game Demon, Nymphs and Dragons. And we tried like hell to get Gary's blessings and came real close. So we ended up dressing ROBERTO BLASINI up as the Dungeon Lord.
I was close to calling it A.D.D.
However, Joe Nieves the actor who plays Fernando brought up a good point about the name Demons, Nymphs, and Dragons.
So I hope this blog didn't suck. Thanks for reading it.
Saturday, August 26
After 80 years "Winnie The Pooh" decides he like's Chicks and dumps Christopher Robin
by
Christopher Folino
on Sat 26 Aug 2006 06:26 AM PDT
Christopher Robin gets dumped by Winnie the Pooh for cute six year girl! Pooh's new best friend, Darby. Who's a curious & active 6-year-old who likes to jump, run, and solve mysteries around the 100 Acre Woods.
After 80 years, the boy who I was named after, is thrown out all for the sake of "whoring the product to a new generation."
I know Christopher Robin is English, and in every movie or TV show, it's an English guy who ends up being the bad guy. (Watch any season of 24 to prove my point, minus last season) However, Christopher Robin was a sweet kid, he's not an idiot, like that bald headed bastard from PBS "Caillou". Not since the Road Runner, have I wanted to see a cartoon character suffer.
I want to make something very clear, I believe in hell, and in my hell that the marketing staff at Walt Disney will serve tea to Hitler for this one. Who the hell over at Walt Disney decided A.A. Milne had it at all wrong? Did they watch a Pixar Movie and go? "You know what A.A. Milne's really needed? A "Boo" from Monster's Inc. clone to make this "Winnie The Pooh" character pop! What's next replace his jar of honey with a box of Lucky Charms and replace the 100 Acre Woods location with Las Vegas?
Here's a quick scene from the new show.
EXT. LAS VEGAS -STRIP -NIGHT TIME
Pooh is walking past the Mirage which is showing advertisement for Camal Lights on it's big screen TV, Pooh, with his friends close to him, looks inside an empty box of Lucky Charms. Show girls and model looking guys walk past them.
Winnie The Pooh
"Oh Rabbit, I say, Do you happen to have a box full of Lucky Charms? Mine, seem to have vanished in my tummy...hee, hee."
RABBIT
(No longer pissed off, new change for the new show)
I'm sorry Pooh, all I need in the morning is my tasty "McGriddle sandwhich from McDonalds!" Tigger? Have you a box of yummy "Lucky Charms?"
TIGGER
(Doing Pilates now instead jumping)
Ohhhh....the wonderful thing about being a tigger is that you drink Starbucks coffee all day!" I don't have any Lucky Charms, but,, we go ask our new best friend at CSI on CBS to help us locate the missing "Lucky Charms?"
I hope this new twist with the Pooh, fails, I really do, I hope this goes over as nicely as the time "Scrappy Doo" was introduced to the Mystery Inc Gang, or the time some dickhead thought that the "Pink Panther" should talk or when some "ass monkey" executive made "Tom and Jerry "best friends. Please go stick a jar of honey up your asses, the "Winnie The Pooh" franchise already makes up a huge chunk of money for Walt Disney's and now they want to squeeze out more?
http://jimhillmedia.com/blogs/jim_hill/archive/2006/08/23/5295.aspx?winnie
One unnamed Disney Company official told the reporter last week:
"Look, we've already got the old Winnie the Pooh fans. The people who originally fell in love with this character through our movies or the A.A. Milne books. What we're after now are new Winnie the Pooh fans. The kids. And when it comes to marketing cartoon characters to kids these days, the competition can be fierce.
Let's face it. Compared to Spongebob Squarepants, Pooh seems very plain. Which is why we're using every weapon in our arsenal -- the computer animation, adding a cute little girl and her dog to the cast -- to make this 80-year-old character seem more entertaining & relevant to today's audiences."
Kid's haven't changed that much, Spongebob is a great character, embrass the fact, you idiot, that Winnie the Pooh is for a younger audience. Why not instead of raping all that is sacred, you go out and create an original character? And while your at it? Haven't you sucked the life out of that "She's so Raven" girl enough? So, leave Christopher Robin alone, us Christopher's our a rare find these days. The Catholic Church took away the importance of Saint Christopher in the late seventies/early eighties and now this...Darby! Oh fucking bother!
And don't forget if your in Los Angeles tonight!
Intellivision™ LAUNCHESRetrotopia a monthly party celebrating the roots of the video game culture and it’s just $15 (Ad in LA Weekly includes a $5 off coupon). The Arena Interactive Lounge is located at 11512 Santa Monica Blvd. For additional information about the event or venue, visit the Arena Interactive Lounge website at www.arenalounge.com or call (310) 479-9759. Starts at 7PM!
Cast & Crew members to be there to meet and sign: William Katt, Dave Hanson, Melissa Rivas, Paul Rivas and me.
We will be selling the DVDs and some T-Shirts also.
And lastly "Gamers The Movie", is now available for international sales at www.buygamers.com So if your German, Irish, Australian, English, Spanish, Dutch, Vulcan, or anything else, we will sell it to you! So live long and buy lots of copies.
And email Netflix and tell them you want them to carry "Gamers The Movie" to rent! It's a moral imperative.
Friday, August 25
The Blog you don't want to miss!
by
Christopher Folino
on Fri 25 Aug 2006 06:14 AM PDT
Looks like my childhood hero, Bruce Springsteen is leaving his second wife Patti Scialfa,after 20 years for a 9/11 widow. That’s kind of tough for Patti, because, you really can’t call a 9/11 widow a “bitch”, “slut bag” or a “whore”, there simply hasn’t been “enough time” passed. I guess, the strongest thing Patti can say about the 9/11 widow is that she’s “not cool”. Not quite the same impact as calling someone a “whore”.
Where can you see the film at and the cast? Other than buying a DVD at www.buygamers.com you cheap bastards! (Respectfully)
AUGUST 26th –Los Angeles, CA
Tomorrow Night, Intellivision™LAUNCHESRetrotopia a monthly party celebrating the roots of the video game culture and it’s just $15 (Ad in LA Weekly includes a $5 off coupon). The Arena Interactive Lounge is located at 11512 Santa Monica Blvd. For additional information about the event or venue, visit the Arena Interactive Lounge website at www.arenalounge.com or call (310) 479-9759. Starts at 7PM!
Cast & Crew members to be there to meet and sign: William Katt, Dave Hanson, Melissa Rivas, Paul Rivas and me.
We will be selling the DVDs and some T-Shirts also.
Again, if you want your “ass kicked” in Major League Baseball on the Intellivision, come see me, that’s right “I will mop your ass up in that game!” I’ll send you home “crying to your mama!” Bitch! Yes, there’s nothing like “trash talking” about how “good you are” on one game for a console system from the early eighties! Still, I’ll murder ya!
SEPTEMBER 3rd –Atlanta, GA –Dragon Con Film Festival
Dragon Con Film Festival which is held in Atlanta, GA –Gamers is having one screening there, and it’s not in competition. Because, it’s a festival for short films, so all you “little people” out there good luck. When I say “little people” I mean midgets, if you didn’t get the joke. And if you’re a midget whose reading this blog? First off, “Wow!” Second, I only said “midgets” because, “you’re kind” hasn’t done a good enough job getting “my kind” to know that you prefer “Little People” I guess you fell short on that quest. Wow, I’m a total dick today on my blog!
Screening Time –Hyatt –LearningCenter, September 3rd, 11:30PM –Screening of “GAMERS”
And if you’re bored beyond belief, come see me, even though I had no idea I was booked for this earlier in the evening.
CAST & CREW APPEARANCE: Maybe Me only (We is flat ass broke)
Q&A SESSION -7PM Low Budget Film Making: The Good, The Bad, and the Really, Really Stupid: These guys have made their films. The directors of the hillbilly alien “Night Feeders”, The zany comedy “Gamers”, and the Lovecraftian “Strange Aeons”, will describe how, and what went wildly wrong.) Paul Barrett, Christopher Folino, Eric Morgret
Our movie is zany? Fantastic, better than the word “fucked” I guess. What an interesting panel? Two horror films and “Zany” us! As Paul and Eric describe how they killed off zombies and aliens in a cool way, I’ll make sure to share the secret of what we used for
“Horse Juice””
September 9th –Indiana –IndianaUniversitySouth Bend
INDIANAUNIVERSITYSOUTH BEND GAMERS GUILD –Jason Fritz and the club are having a party of September 9th will be having a screening of “Gamers”
September 11th –G4 Media “Electric Playground” –Everywhere!
Watch exclusive clips and interviews about the movie!
September 22nd -24th Houston, Texas -FEN CON
FEN CON in Houston, Texas September 22nd -24th –Chuck the man from Austin is helping us out with getting a screening there! More details to come in the following weeks.
October 9th -13th –Israel “Icon 2006 Fantastic Film Festival
ICON 2006 Fantastic Film Festival –Exact screening dates to come.
October 27th -29th –Tampa, Florida -NECRONOMICON
NECRONOMICON in Tampa, Flordia October 27th-29th –We are working for a screening there
Thanks to one of the coolest woman on the earth, Ann Morris!
COOL NEWS
So here’s some good news, thanks to Super Fan & Super cool person, Nikki Zalewski! You’ll be able to buy our movie at her local comic book store which is Noble Knights in Janesville, WI and is also online at www.nobleknight.com
Remember, if you want to help get the movie into your local comic book store, we offer a great discount rate to the stores and we pay for shipping. Please send the comic book store this link to learn all about the movie http://gamers.forumcircle.com/viewtopic.php?t=5 and then have them contact us at info@gamers-themovie.com
More Cool Thing a Coming
In the October issue of “Tips and Tricks Magazine” I believe in the “Games on Film” section, Journalist Abbie Heppe has been kind enough to review our movie. Do you know how popular I’m going to be with my five nephews? They worship “Tips and Tricks Magazine” and now, they shall worship me! I’ll make those “little bastards” wash my car and my feet! And while I’m at it, they can go into the coal mines and start earning me some money!
So thank you to all the folks who have bought the DVD, gone out and told some friends and to all the press folks who have been kind enough to give us a chance! Viva La all of you!
Thursday, August 24
An interview with former goat-sucker turned filmmaker El Chupacabra
by
Christopher Folino
on Thu 24 Aug 2006 03:11 AM PDT
In the hopes of helping indie filmmakers around the world to learn exactly what it takes to get into one of the major film festivals, we begin a 10 week series of interviews with top indie filmmakers who have gotten their films into the most coveted film festivals around the world. It’s my honor and pleasure to introduce former goat-sucker turned filmmaker El Chupacabra whose new film "All Aboard! Bigfoot Yeti and El Chupacabras Family Cruise" took home best picture by a L.A.C., Latin American Creature at this years Sundance film festival. He knocked out the Loch Ness Monsters film "Awesome; I Fuckin Shot that" for top honors.
FOLINO: Welcome El Chupacabra to my blog, I have to tell you back in 1992 when the whole internet thing was taking off, so was another business...meth. So, like all true American entrepreneurs I went down to Tijuana to get some "material" and "recruits" to start up my drive-thru Meth Lab/Starbucks in Riverside, California. Sadly, I got caught with a pound of pure "Rat Posion" in my ass and I was incarcerated for all of 1992. However, that’s when I learned the story of El Chupacabra, and I found it fascinating. People not only blamed you for sucking goats to death, but also for AIDS, breaking up Charlie Sheens marriage, and now for causing the war in Iraq. You sir, have quite the Bad Boy reputation?
EL CHUPACABRA: (Laughs, more like a snort with a heavy Mexican accent) Oh yes meth! Did you know that just one pound can get 1,816 high for twelve hours? But, you really have to be a wizard in the lab. Hey, wait, that’s the "old El Chupacabra" talking. (Leans into the camera) Off the record, I use to digest meth like it was a dinner mint. It helped settle my stomach. But, you know what? Those are dark days, however, I was able to draw upon those days of darkness to create my new movie. Today, I am no longer a meth/goat-sucker, I am a Sundance Film Festival winner! Some might say, it’s the same thing, but its not. Being a meth addict, at least you don’t take yourself too serious. And for the record, Charlie and Denise were broken up before I sucked on that lovely neck of a man.
FOLINO: Okay, well, lets talk about how you went from goat-sucker to Sundance film festival winner? Take us on that journey El C. Can I call you El C?
EL CHUPACABRA: No you may not. However, I love America and my story of fame is to be thanked by all you Americans. Because, this is a society where whores like Paris Hilton and people with no talent (place any American Idol contestants name here) can become famous. I too wanted to be famous and feared! Kind of like a serial killer! You know like Charles Manson, however, I didn’t want to do jail, or for people to think I was a complete freak. That kind of kills the merchandising sales. So instead, I chose to suck the blood out of goats until they died and I posted all the killings on youtube.com. So, really, I see myself as just an "extreme" version of Ozzy Osbourne but, with a cool Latino twist.
So after years of sucking goats all around Mexico and South America, "Yo MTV Cribes" Latin America called me up asking if they could showcase my cave. They said the kids wanted to see where El Chupacabra lets his hair down and chills. I told them it was really just a "fucking dirt cave", but, kids today are so God damn lame, that they thought I was "phat", by living in dirt. I immediately got famous and offered a job as a V.J. on the Latin American MTV and then Big Foot, me and Antonio Sabato Jr. did our version of "Jackass" for all the Spanish MTV stations. Oh Antonio, he's such a pussy, that pretty boy, never wanting to get his face bit by a "two- headed bull" or a "starving lion on acid."
So, from that show MTV funded Me and Yetis first motion picture "All Aboard! Bigfoot Yeti and El Chupacabras Family Cruise" We had a real low budget of only 6 Million dollars. However, we attended the Sundance lab, where we were able to turn a "stupid idea" into a movie that takes itself way to serious and get funding for it by a major studio and still have the Sundance Film Festival approval that it's an indie movie!
FOLINO: So do you think there’s a "magic formula" to get in the Sundance and the other major film festivals?
EL CHUPACABRA: Oh yeah, they love a good lesbian movie, and then if you can have her fuck a dog that’s a "minority", your so in! Also, they fall for any indie film with "big time movie stars" like the one Brad Pitt just dumped they love that chick. And you need to have at least a 9 million dollar budget! That’s real indie! And a good thing too is to cast Steve Carell in your movie, then bitch to the Entertainment Weekly about how daring you were to cast him in a movie, because, he just finished "The 40 year old Virgin" and was already the lead in an NBC show called "The Office". However, you still took a chance on this "unknown".
If that doesn’t work then learn to suck a "good dick" and have the ability to smuggle 8 pounds of pure coke in your ass. I’m not saying the festival directors are on the take, I’m just saying it never hurts to be able to "suck a little cock and offer coke" at the same time. I call it the "Park City Special".
FOLINO: Wow, El Chupacabra, that’s shocking! The Sundance Film Festival is an American Treasure for Independent filmmaking; I can guarantee you with that statement one of us will never ever be invited to Sundance.
EL CHUPACABRA: Who cares, its only money, and it's not art. Take The Gen Con Film Festival now that's a festival!
FOLINO: I know you have a lot of other interviews to do, However, I'd like to ask you one last question. What advice do you have for other inspiring filmmakers who want to get into a major film festival?
EL CHUPACABRA: Never ever give up! However, you're best bet is to be the son of a famous filmmaker or more directly, Robert Redford's daughter, then for sure you'll get in, no matter how "shitacular" the movie is!
Take my film, it’s a documentary about how Big Foot and I our gay. Which we pretended only for the movie, just to get into Sundance! Our whole movie is about how two gay monsters go on a cruise ship and invite all the other gay minority creatures to spend a weeks vacation, free of society's judgment. Well, that's the screener copy we showed at Sundance, the director's cut is how Yeti and I get bored on day 2 and we start killing off the other monsters, that’s what sales at the box office! Got to go, I need a nap before going on Oprah today and I hear Pat O’Brien and I are going to snort coke off an Elephant's ass and get whores! Its good to be the El Chupacabra!
Wednesday, August 23
Blog-O-Wednesday
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 23 Aug 2006 10:56 AM PDT
This Saturday Night in Los Angeles, Intellivision is throwing a super party with Gamers the movie there.
We are going to hand-out free T-Shirts, DVDs and bumper stickers and I pray to God they got a real intellivision hooked-up, I'm bringing Major League Baseball and whoever beats me at the game I'll buy free drinks for. Let me tell you right now, there are three things I'm sure of in life.
1. Death will happen
2. Taxes have to be paid
3. I can kick most anybody's ass in Major League Baseball on the Intellivision
Admission to Retrotopia is $15 (Ad in LA Weekly includes a $5 off coupon). The Arena Interactive Lounge is located at 11512 Santa Monica Blvd. For additional information about the event or venue, visit the Arena Interactive Lounge website at www.arenalounge.com or call (310) 479-9759.
G4 "Electric Playground" Update
The Segment about the movie will air, Monday, September 11th (Please no terrorist attacks) and it appears they'll also be showing the Full Spectrum Warrior: Ten Hammers Trailer, that inspired us to max out all our credit cards and get a bank loan to make "Gamers"
When you watch the Full Spectrum Warrior Ten Hammers Trailer, keep an eye out for Kevin Sherwood (The Dungeon Master) as the lead and he does the voice over. The guy on the radio is my brother Steven Folino.
One of the other main guys is Joey, my cousin's boyfriend is also in it. We teamed up with Mario Vanillo, my old neighbor who now is one the leading special effects guru in the business. He was the one who got us the entire crew from Jarhead to help us create this trailer.
You figure if your going to shoot 35MM and at that time only get to do it once in your lifetime, you better get the people you trust to help you!
It's funny, the majority of folks who seek the Full Spectrum Warrior trailer where we blow shit up, all ask me why I didn't make that into a movie.
Here's a link, if I haven't whored the thing out enough.
My vote for the greatest person alive...Nikki Zalewski! I think we may succeed with this movie because of her alone!
Check this woman out! God love her!
Obsessive Fan of the Week" August 22, 2006
Dear Entertainment Weekly,
I have been an avid reader of you magazine for many years now. Simply
love checking the mail and finding the latest copy. It brightens my
day. I get my movie news and upcoming releases. The one section that I
feel expresses my current feelings is "Obsessive Fan of the Week." Now
I know you must get tons of mail from people that say they are that
fan. This is the first time I got enough courage to send in my
obsession. I appreciate you giving me that opportunity.
My boyfriend Gary convinced me to go to GenCon, a huge gaming
festival in Indiana. I was apprehensive at best, thinking there would
be nothing for me there since I am not a "gamer." I turned out to be
dead wrong.
In a nearby hotel they were having a film festival and I thought
"Yep, this will be right up my alley." We saw a couple movies and they
were ok, but it all turned around for me and Gary when we saw "Gamers"
the movie. We went to the 9p.m. showing and I am so glad that we did.
As I have said, I am not a gamer, but I know enough about the lingo
and the actions to get by. This movie was fantastic. "Gamers" is the
autobiographical comedic account of Chris Folino (the writer/director)
and his 23 years of playing the game Dungeons and Dragons, a popular
role playing game. It was shot on 35mm in 6 days, that's just
incredible. After the movie ended I turned to my boyfriend and said
"We have to get this movie!"
After the showing, Chris Folino, Michael Bell (the narrator), Kevin
Sherwood, Dave Hanson, Joe Nieves, and Scott Allen Rinker (actors in
the movie) stayed to field questions and take comments. I didn't pose
a question or comment at that time. I did however go up to Chris,
shake his hand and tell him how much I enjoyed the film.
I am no slouch when it comes to movies. My favorite thing to do is go
to movies. It is my way to transport to another place and disconnect
from anything that may be bothering me. This movie really transcends
the gamer/ non-gamer boundaries. Let's face it, funny is funny no
matter what realm you travel. Anyone or anything that can make me
laugh is worth its weight in gold.
The very next day, Gary and I went to see the guys at their booth in
the GenCon exhibition hall. We bought the dvd and four shirts with
lines from the movie on them. All the guys graciously autographed the
items we bought and let us take pictures free of charges. Coming from
a fan stand point that is tremendous. We were so excited that we
decided to see the movie again that evening.
We caught the 6p.m showing this time, wearing our shirts we had
purchased that day. We sat in the front row. We heard laughter and
cheers throughout the movie. I even caught lines I seemed to have
missed in the first go round. When we came out of the room there was a
line well around the corner for the late showing. I was amazed at just
how many people were there to see it.
The main reason I am writing this to you is because there are a lot
of big box office movies that have the money for publicity and any
other marketing strategies. This is an independent movie with tons of
heart in it. As if that weren't enough, John Heard, Kelly LeBrock,
William Katt, and Beverly D'Angelo are in it as well. Narrated by a
vocal great Michael Bell. They believed in this movie and became a
part of it, so that says something. Too often these grand movies fly
way below the radar and it would be great to give them an opportunity
to be seen by all. By the way they received top honors as best
professional film at the festival.
Ever since I have been home that has been my quest. To spread the
word about this gem. I have written to gaming magazines, posted on RPG
message boards, and on myspace in attempts to get people interested
and involved. Sometimes I am up till 1 or 2a.m. trying to get the word
out about this movie I love. The only thing was that people I know in
the area wanted to borrow my copy, to which I replied "Um, no." I am
very territorial about my movie collection (400+ movies) and have lost
movies to people that borrowed them. This one is extra special to me
since it is autographed by Michael Bell, Willam Katt, Chris Folino,
Joe Nieves, Dave Hanson, and Scott Allen Rinker. No one will be able
to pry that out of my hands for any price.
The last time I was this excited about a movie was when "Sin City"
came out. I must have watched that trailer dozens of times. This movie
is so funny that I am quoting lines and wanting to watch it over an
over again. Just think, I really could have missed out if I hadn't
been to GenCon at all.
I humbly thank you for your patience, time, and consideration. I may
only be a one woman army in this crusade, but I have more
determination than you may ever find. I am obsessed with this movie
and proud to tell the world.
Much love,
Nikki Zalewski
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Tuesday, August 22
Brand new Podcast -Sick, Twisted, and ahhh what else do you expect
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 22 Aug 2006 06:41 AM PDT
Here's a treat, the sick bastards from gamestats.net interviewed the sick bastard cast of "Gamers" so here you go!
http://www.gamestas.net
President Bush Taps Jack Bauer to save us all and Paris Hilton is still a major slut -Today's headlines and more!
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 22 Aug 2006 03:49 AM PDT
We take a day off from "Gamers The Movie" news, to bring you this special report.
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS
The Porn industry suffered a major blow today, as an Indian businessman born with two penises decided to get one of them removed surgically.
What the hell is wrong with this guy? He could of been the next "somebody" in the porn world! He has two fully functional penises! Christ! that only occurs among one in 5.5 million men!
He could of gotten his own show on CBS, right after "Two and a Half Men"
Hell, he's almost two and half men!
Paris Hilton praises her self debut album, she says, "I, like, cry, when I listen to it, it's so good." Gosh, I remember when she was just rich girl who had a knack for sucking dick on a home video...it's empowering to see her expand her range from swallowing to singing...She's a role model for rich slutty girls everywhere.
"Hello?" Nicole Richie blames stress for skinny body..."Say you say me", she weighs 84 pounds...I remember, when she was "Three Times A Lady"...Somebody needs to start snacking at "Taco Bell" perhaps, "All Night Long."
Robin Williams in Alcohol Rehab...Still there is no excuse, even if he was drunk to ever make "RV, Bicentennial Man, Patch Adams, Flubber, Jakob the Liar, Jack, Toys, and Club Paradise." Not even if he was drunk, on meth and shooting pure "Liquid Drano" into his veins.
POLITICAL NEWS
Bush argues Democrats don't understand threat to U.S.
Democrats have pointed to polls showing public support for the war is continuing to wane, and the president acknowledged as much today. These are challenging times, and theyre difficult times, and theyre straining the psyche of our country, Mr. Bush said during an hour-long news conference. Nobody wants to turn on their TV on a daily basis and see havoc wrought by terrorists.
Mr. Bush announced plans to spend 8 billion dollars in tax payers money to make the TV show 24, an actual 24 hour a day program to air on all network. Bush commented "Now, Americans can turn on the TV and see that Jack Bauer is kicking "terrorist butt" every hour. It will raise the people's spirits and it sends a clear message to terrorist, not to fuck with Keifer Sutherland!"
Monday, August 21
Gamers The Movie day?
by
Christopher Folino
on Mon 21 Aug 2006 05:40 AM PDT
Two major reviews/interviews, and we team-up with the greatest console system ever for a DVD party on August 26th!
So much "Gamers" info that I pray it doesn't backfire on us with low audience turn out at the box office like "Snakes on a Plane"...oh wait, no problem, we aren't in theaters!
ROSE FOLINO (MY WIFE) GETS INTERVIEWED ABOUT "GAMERS" BY GEEK WOMAN
So, here's a first ever regarding the movie, an interview with my wife! That's right Rose Folino, (Doesn't it sound like she should know how to make a mean pizza?) This lovely lady who was born an raised in San Francisco and who graduated from BerkleyCalifornia where she created her own major. (That's right, I married a smart one and a looker so the kid's would have a fighting chance, my gene pool ain't exactly helping)
It's a great interview, the wife has such a command of the English language, it's like ahhh, fucking amazing like!
And after reading the article, you'll be like "Why is this poor woman with that son-of-a-bitch?" Learn about her perspective of being in the hospital while I ditched her to go make the movie! Yes, husband of the year award winner...right here!
Here is the link!
http://www.womengamers.com/interviews/rosefolino.php
Once again writer Geek Woman who has become sort of like the "Mother Teresa of the press for "Gamers" doesn't a fantastic interview!
Serious, Geek Woman, has done so much in coverage for us, from writing her own movie review to doing interviews, and getting others to review the film. We love Geek Woman! Yes We do! If this movie ever makes it out of my garage for distribution, I will take you dinner in Hawaii! If not, I will send you some Hawaiian roles and a copy of "Lilo and Stick" on DVD and you can pretend? Cool? Thank you again Geek Woman!
GAMEFREAK.COM reviews the DVD/Movie and gives it a 8.2
And I get called out for being fixated with gay overtones in the movie in a rather really great review of the movie by "Gamefreaks.com
Fair enough! Kyle Bell ranks it as followed. Jennifer Campana, PR legend pretty much got us this review and she's the Uma Thurman of PR!
Movie: 9
Acting 8.5
Extras 7
Final 8.2
Read the whole review here! You got to read any review that states "I’m not quite sure why I find Gamers entertaining."
I loved it!
http://gamefreaks365.com/review.php?artid=918
And lastly look at what movie teamed up with the greatest console system in the free world to have a DVD premiere launch on August 26th!
Come on out and meet William Katt, Dave Hanson, myself and hopefully the rest of the cast...I've left messages, however, I'm still waiting on some calls! God Damn it!
Intellivision™ LAUNCHES RETROTOPIA NIGHT IN STYLE WITH DVD PREMIERE OF GAMERS, THE MARIO OPERA AND FREE PLAY GAMES AT ARENA INTERACTIVE LOUNGE
Live Podcast by AllGames.com, Cool Prizes, and an 80s Costume Contest Round Out
Inaugural Night Celebrating the Culture of Video Games
LOS ANGELES (August XX, 2006) – Intellivision™, one of the founding pioneers of the video game revolution, will launch Retrotopia, a monthly event at the Arena Interactive Lounge starting August 26 and running once every month. The event brings together two generations of video game pop culture - the ever-popular video games of the 1980s, popularized by the classic stand-up arcade machines and Intellivision and Atari home systems, with today’s popular home consoles, such as the Microsoft Xbox, Sony PlayStation 2 and Nintendo GameCube.
“Retrotopia is a party celebrating the roots of the video game culture,” said Keith Robinson, president of Intellivision Productions, Inc. “It combines the affection many have for the classic arcade-style of video games, which has been lost since the late 1980s, with today’s popular home console systems. We couldn’t have picked a more perfect place to introduce the Retrotopia culture than the Arena Interactive Lounge.”
Swinging a new generation of gamers back to the pixilated glory of the 1980s, Retrotopia attendees will enjoy music from and inspired by the era along with an inaugural night performance by local favorites The Mario Opera, a rock opera based on the Super Mario Bros. video game. There will also be a live podcast by AllGames.com, hosted by video game authority Scot Rubin. Attendees are also encouraged (though not required) to dress up in their favorite 80s attire to compete for prizes such as DVDs, video games and t-shirts.
The inaugural Retrotopia night will also serve as the location for the official DVD launch of Gamers, by hot up-and-coming writer/director Christopher Folino, a mockumentary in the style of “Spinal Tap” about Dungeons & Dragons and the unwavering love of 80s-style role playing games. Folino, along with the film’s stars, will be on hand for the launch. The DVD will be available for purchase and the stars will be available for autographs and photos.
Attendees will have full access to all of the Arena Interactive Lounge amenities including 15 console stations featuring Xbox, Xbox 360, PlayStation 2 and Nintendo GameCube consoles. Each station has plush, custom-built “rumble” couches, 50-inch flat screen HDTV monitors and an extensive collection of games ranging from retro-collections to the hottest titles of today. For Retrotopia night, old-school stand-up arcade machines provided by Vintage Arcade Superstore will adorn the walls and a working, authentic, original Intellivision game console will be available to play on, giving gamers young and old a chance to play video games the way they did back in 1980.
Admission to Retrotopia is $15 (Ad in LA Weekly includes a $5 off coupon). The Arena Interactive Lounge is located at 11512 Santa Monica Blvd. For additional information about the event or venue, visit the Arena Interactive Lounge website at www.arenalounge.com or call (310) 479-9759.
That's the blog for today, that's a whole lot of shit you just read...you're a good person for reading all this...I hope a Care Bear hugs you naked!
Viva La You!
Sunday, August 20
Story of Meeting Kelly LeBrock and how she signed up for "Gamers" -Every Sunday read the best blogs of the year
by
Christopher Folino
on Sun 20 Aug 2006 09:42 AM PDT
I remember Michelle Metzner, the casting director for "Gamers" got John Heard first casts for Gamers and that gave us like instant credibility with all the other agents. Her husband's best friend was John Heards personal trainer. We casted the trainer in a part of the movie as part of the deal for delivering Mr. Heard.
We were no longer, quirky film with quirky people you never heard of making it.
Well, we went to real actor joins quirky film with quirky people you still never ever heard of.
John was so cool, the day he took the part he called Michelle up and didn't even say hi, he just started quoting the script to her like "I'm just watching a little TV porn with your mom!"
If my own mother were still alive today the pride she would have in me for this movie. She would of moved to a different country for the language alone.
So, when Michelle asked us who would be our dream actress to play Angela's mom, we of course said Kelly LeBrock.
Well, Kelly was a smart one, unlike John Heard who said yes right away. Kelly wanted to meet with me at the Beverly Hills Hotel at the bar there. I was like really? Why me? Oh yeah, it's my movie.
I remember I showed up in a shirt that a hole in it, and I spent like 40 minutes driving around trying to get a new shirt and I said fuck it. So I walk in the hotel and I'm early. Like 40 minutes early.
Now, I've never met a real actor or actresses at that point in my life.
I was born in Pasadena and raised in El Monte and I didn't spend any time in Hollywood.
I once was at a Springsteen concert and I said "Hey look its Kevin Costner!" as he walked by. He stopped and looked at me and then went on his way.
And once at the Calabasas Cocos I saw Potsie from Happy Days and by the way I asked the waitress and he sucks at tipping. In fact, he got his haircut at the Supercuts in Calabasas also, and the hair stylist confirmed to me that he did indeed suck at tipping. I being a man of no fame took it upon myself to over tip for Anson on both occasions. If I ever see him again, he owes me like eight bucks.
So, I hung out at the bathroom at the Beverly Hills hotel, which is fucking sweet. The stalls are like suites in there and real towels. Hell, I got a thing for clean bathrooms. I got a call from Michelle our casting director and she told me Beverly was all in. She and John did their first movie together and she loves the man. Who doesn't?
So finally, it's like 8 minutes until meeting time and I walk over to the restaurant/bar and look at the host. He looks at me like who is the fucking tourist and I say I have a meeting with Kelly LeBrock. God damn, if two staff people didn't come and music from the heaven started to play and they took whisked me outside to the private patio where only the stars get to hang. I saw Cheri O'Teri from SNL at a table across from me and they got this guy playing guitar and singing some James Taylor. Hell, the guy could have been James Taylor.
The service was amazing, and about five minutes later in walks Kelly LeBrock. Amazing woman with very stunning eyes. I'm talking the kind of eyes that could pierce your soul and she was so positive and supportive. Because, I kept saying words like "I hope the movie does well", and she like "it's going to make you rich for your family." Hell, it's kind of a nice thing having a super model that hasn't seen your work you did with a jib arm at The Home Depot believe in you.
Kelly took time off to raise her family and she was talking about how she got chased by a bull on the farm and all this outdoors stuff that sounded like very hard work to me.
She's so funny and makes perfect eye contact. The first thing she said was that she blinked and almost missed her part in the film and then she came up with the orgasm line and said go ahead and expand her role. And my God the mouth on that womans, she can swear! It's so cool!
We talked a lot about family and at that time my wife and I were expecting twins.
It was one of the best highlights of the entire project for me. I owe that woman a great deal. I left feeling all good and like I was somebody special.
And then it took me 40 minutes to find my way out of the Beverly Hills hotel and I was back to second guessing myself to do this project since I can't even fucking navigate myself out of a large pink hotel.
Saturday, August 19
True stories about distribution offers that will make you say "No F-ing way!"
by
Christopher Folino
on Sat 19 Aug 2006 05:43 AM PDT
I've kind of gone out of my way not to write too much about distribution offers, I think mostly out of superstition and the fact that the offers really suck "major ass".
I think like most indie folks who write a movie, you think your going to be discovered like Kevin Smith. The truth of the matter is that you have better odds running into Paris Hilton at Popeye's Chicken and nailing her on top of the fryer. (Turned off of course, however, luke warm enough that it feels good and you get that smell of deep fried shrimp mixed with sex. Wow, what a treat for the people who order the next day.
So, here now are some true distribution stories and offers.
National Lampoon -You have no idea how beyond "stocked" I was to get a phone call from these guys. Serious, "Vacation" is a fantastic movie! Sure, they've produce nothing but "utter shit" in the last decade. However, the hope was that "Gamers" could bring the honor back to the name "National Lampoon" name. What an ego I have you say? Well, have you watched "Gold Diggers" or that other shit movie with Bon Jovi in it? It's not an ego, it's just knowing what your movie isn't...and that's "complete shit".
So, I get a call from some V.P. and the guy is like "Didn't get the movie, didn't understand it, you "Gamers" are strange people." I was thinking to myself, that's nice! He's starting off with an insult to "butter me up". Then he tells me that for $500K, he'll help us market the movie to young people, we can't use the name National Lampoon though in the title. However, he'll help us get the movie out to the youth. I started laughing at him on the phone. Needless to say the guy still emails me and writes me. This is how National Lampoon see's themselves, here's a quick line from the email they send me.
"National Lampoon unquestionably controls what is arguably the most potent collection of marketing, media platforms, and touch points in the young adult marketplace today and we can give you access to this world."
Unquestionably and Arguably he's full of shit. For $500,000 I hope you can give me access to "Pornland" which is rumored to be behind the Abe Lincoln animatronics at Disneyland, where young naked female virgins hunt old used-up men all day and then feed them "Slim Jims"at night with beer of course.
Serious, if we had $500,000 we'd spend $120K To pay off the all the debt and go make another film and I'd hire a team of little people to hang-out with me on the set and have them feed me "Slim Jims" day and night.
Amazon -For the pleasure of selling your movie on Amazon, they'll take 75 percent of all profits, plus they charge you like $4.95 for handling and shipping. All you do is ship them the copies of the movie! Don't like that deal? Too low? Well, they'll give you 40 percent if Amazon is the "exclusive dealer", meaning you can't sell it anywhere else.
And Amazon promises to just post your movie on their web site, no advertisement, as if it once you post on Amazon, everyone around the world will know...like fucking Obi-Wan will send out a signal to all the consumers in the world.
I'm no math major, but, I think this adds up to "Rape"
Shoreline Entertainment, Inc. -True story, the rep guy offered us a 50/50 deal and he said the movie won't make more than 100K in it's lifetime and that he and his team also decided all matters concerning the movie. We the filmmakers would lose all rights and have no say word whatever on the offers we get.
I think I told this rep that he's "fucking nuts" and "good luck fucking somebody else", yes, those were my exact words.
And lastly, let's call these guys
Team X -We had a meeting, I asked what's the most amount of money they ever sold a movie for and he responded "$100K" . And then he offered us, and I'm not lying about this, to pay his company $35K to go to Cannes to market our movie and then we'll split the profits 50/50. I interjected, "Okay, say you sell the movie for 100K which is the best you have ever done, you take 50K right away?" and he responds "Yes" I responded "Then you take 35K more for marketing expenses?" And he nods his head like a good puppy. And again, I'm no math major, however, I stated "You make 85K and we get 15K?"And he's smiling at me like he just cured cancer in my left nut sack.
In talking with William Katt, whose been in front and behind the camera, it's fucked up. He was given five percent of the gross for the horror film he did called "House" The movie was made for under 3 million and it grossed over 41 million world wide. That movie was done in 1987, and William Katt has never seen a dime from it and he owns five percent?
So what is our game plan?
I spend a lot of evenings attempting to get in touch with Blockbuster, Netflix, Hollywood video and all the independent video rental chains in the United States. For every 10,000 emails, I think I get about 20 responses. It's that pathetic, however, you can't give up.
What we have going for us is a product we believe in and all we need is one little break to get the movie into Netflix or Blockbuster and bam, we got a shot at getting our money back and then we can share it with the cast and crew. We did this movie because, we wanted too, not to fuck over friends or to become famous. It was a dream, but, sadly, you have to realize people make a living taking advantage of other people's dream.
But, this is fun having these meetings, I enjoy it! I really do. We made the movie, that's the big hurdle, it's a matter of time, before, we meet somebody who doesn't want to "rape you" in Hollywood.
Friday, August 18
MySpace Best Friend Picked and a message to my former high school principal
by
Christopher Folino
on Fri 18 Aug 2006 05:45 AM PDT
There's nothing worse than having your former high school principal read your blogs.
Serious, maybe my mother, however, mine is still a bit dead. So when you say "fuck" and you slam the President on being a total tool in the middle east, I get an email from my former high school principal, Merritt Hemenway. By the way, he's the one I blame for my horrible spelling skills!
I truly respect the man, even if our political views are as different as Hall and Oates sexual preferences...maybe that's not a good example, those two may be playing on the same team.
So, Merritt gave me my first start and supported me beyond belief in High School to make my first movie. You can see him in "Gamers" as Uncle Billy, the guy who has a relapse with cancer. And he was the one who got me into the Bishop Amat High School, both my brothers went, however, I was so fucking bad in math and in English, that I didn't pass the entrance exam. Oh the shame, my poor family felt!
I remember my mom calling our grade school prinicipal who was a nun (Not hot at all) and she was the one who contacted Merritt and he was kind enough to let me in.
Bishop Amat High School, that's the foundation, the chance, the place I made my first movie, I met Kevin Sherwood and it's the path that led me to my greatest personal achievement in life! That's right! A movie about a bunch of guys playing Dungeons and Dragons! And a film, that features male clown on clown porn and a guy masterbating a horse. Thank you Bishop Amat Catholic High School, no fucking way I would of made this kind of movie, if I had a public school education! (Serious, I would of made some movie about a woman fucking a dog that would of done wonderful in festivals)
Wow, I wonder why I'm not part of the alumni program?
And for the man to be in "Gamers" which isn't exactly a "Christian friendly film", speaks highly of the value of the friendship.
His son, who I referred to as the T-Shirt guy the other day, in perhaps the most depressing blog ever that I wrote (Anne Frank's you don't know what depressing is) is a good kid and sadly, I found out that his friend died while the same time he was making our T-shirts.
I didn't know it, and had I known, my response would be "fuck the T-Shirts for Gen Con", there's more important things. I remember working for The Home Depot, and this is a true story. I was at home taking care of my mom who was dying of cancer, and the head guy in Atlanta calls me up and say "You have to come out for a team building exercise in Atlanta!" I'm in California, and I'm young and stupid, fearing that I'd lose my job, I go and it's the most fucking stupidest thing I've ever been part of in corporate America. We are doing lame ass shit, like blind folding each other and then having to help that person cross over rocks, and then trusting people to catch us. Oh, it was so "Fucking Lame" and all the time, I was like, if my mother dies, I'm going to skull fuck each of these "bitches".
Did it work? Did The Home Depot have the greatest team in the video department ever? Fuck no, the guys in charge were total dick heads. You want to improve morale at the work place? You pay better and treat your people with respect. You don't spend 20K going out in the forest and acting like a bunch of jerk offs!
I miss spending three days with my mother while she's dying. When I got back she wasn't talking any more, so thank you Home Depot for that one!
Look, if the team building exercise was hanging with strippers and shooting rockets at terrorist or Sundance Film programers...then fucking "A" I'm all in! However, my point is, that it's those moments in life when you lose a love one, that nothing else matters and T-Shirts for a movie about "Gaming" can wait.
I just thought the kid was a flake and I was making a voodoo doll of him and was about to force him to make-out with the voodoo doll of Kevin Kirkpatrick while my CD of Hall and Oates "Greatest Hits" played in the background.
So to Merritt, I say this "I fucking love you man! You're the greatest fucking principal in the whole fucking world!" and a good friend. To Tom, I I wish from this day forward that no more of your friends ever allowed to die again.
However, because, you didn't tell me all this, I am sending you on a team building exercise in Atlanta.
MYSPACE BEST FRIEND PICKED
And for all the folks who want to know who I'm picking as "Gamers The Movie" new MySpace Best Friend for the next 15 days!
I'm picking Stephan A.K.A. CS x B. He's got the song "Disarm" playing by the Smashing Pumpkins. That alone is pretty cool in my book.
Stephan is 21 from Silent Hill, Montana. One of our producers and a dear friend Melissa Rivas is from Montana and that woman kicks ass!
I loved all the emails from everyone and it was close, however, Stephan is the man! Go check his profile and you'll find a good kid.
So Stephan, send me your address, you get a free movie, and T-Shirt. And I will be placing you in the number one spot and I'll be checking on you for the next 15 days! And if your ever in California, a free lunch to IN-N-OUT is on me.
So Viva La Stephan from Silent Hill (Hate the video game), Montana!
Thursday, August 17
Gen Con Highlights All the days into one big blog!
by
Christopher Folino
on Thu 17 Aug 2006 06:45 AM PDT
Apparently, my blog on part 1 of Gen Con Indy depressed the living shit out folks.I'll attempt to make this blog so sexy that people will go out and have a real "Cinemax after hours" encounter.
So, you can all thank me in the morning for getting you laid by a cleaning woman from work who just happens to looks like Salma Hayek, but, a little more worn out looking and of course just a total slut with some form of an animal tattoo on her stomach.
First Things First
The Hospitality of Derek, Jennifer and Lazarus Kagemann, these people not only provided transportation, they pretty much brought everything for the booth and they're lovely people...unlike...Kevin Kirkpatrick, who is a pretty much a horrible human being who eats babies. I swear to God, that's all he ate on the set were babies, mostly babies from Fiji. It really added to the budget and morally I was not "Okay" with it. However, he is a hell of an actor.
Serious though, Derek, Jennifer and their son Lazarus we can't express enough thanks to all of them! Without them Gen Con would of made us cry and even broker!
Highlights
The main highlight was meeting all the people who stopped over at the booth and that took time to come to screenings, was awesome. Gamers are very cool people and supportive, unlike Kevin Kirkpatrick, they actually bought a copy of the movie and respond to you when you say "Hello"
Another highlight was Saturday night, Michael Bell, Joe Nieves, Scott Allen Rinker, Kevin Sherwood, Dave Hanson, Derek, Jennifer and Lazarus were hanging out in the hotel room while the cast passed the phone around to do an interview with www.gamestas.net
This wasn't a normal interview, there was cursing, and Michael Bell. The son of a bitch was on! We were all dying listening to him, it's not right. You need to listen to just his section when they post it.
And it was cool hanging out with everybody talking and laughing. Derek passed Lazarus around and everybody took photos with the baby during the interview. Yep, what a crazy bunch of people we are! No drinking, just passing the baby around, and the baby wasn't a big fat joint.
Kevin and I hung-out with Hanson, Nieves, and Rinker and just bullshited late into the evening. It was cool to catch up and afterwards, we got such a talented cast, and good people too. Maybe not Kevin Kirkpatrick so much, but the rest of them...golden.
Sunday Afternoon Highlight
We won the film festival this year for "Best Professional Film" at the Gen Con Film Festival
And yes, there was some competition, there were two other films, one dropped out and we won both the jury award and audience award.
A wins a win baby! And these are my people! Folks who would rather game day and night then to go to Park City, Utah and support a studio "indie film" about a girl who fucks a dog and then has to live with that over her head growing up. That's right, that's one movie that got into Sundance over us....Nice, so whose the nerd now? People who game? Or people who fly to Park City, Utah and who pay good money to watch movies about a girl who fucks a dog? I can honestly say, that not even in my gaming days did my Dwarf Fighter, Grungles the Ugly Bastard, ever even consider fucking a dog or any other animal. I even had a half-orc thief named Chunks, and even he had standards.
You know what? I've been playing 23 years...I'm sorry, nobody fucked a dog in my gaming group, let alone made a movie about it. Dog fucking is just wrong both in the real world and in the fantasy world.
Screening Highlights
The first night we screened on Thursday, so many folks turned out that they had opened up another screening room.My favorite part was when two women in the audience declared how much they liked our movie. One liked it better than Clerks 2! That's right Kevin Smith you bitch, go smoke a pack to recover from that! By the way I emailed him for the fuck of it and challenged him to a movie quote off.
Serious, I sent off like three quotes and was like "Dude, your so going to lose" And he would...serious, when we got quotes like "Hardcore Man Fucker" (That's all Dave Hanson) and "I live at home with my parents, it's just temporary...til' they die" Which by the way makes a pretty fucking sweet T-Shirt which happens to be for sale at www.buygamers.com!
I never got a response...Rejection! Yeah! Builds character and drives postal workers to the edge.
So focus, back to Gen Con, the screenings went great. The people were cool and they understood it was autobiographical and not a slam on gamers.
The best quote came from a guy who described the movie as "A train wreck with crippled children on board"
We got to meet Aaron from Wisconsin, which I know I misspelled his name. He's 17 and he told us how much he enjoyed the movie after the screening and we invited him to dinner. He personally told me that he was going to make all his friends purchase the DVD, otherwise he would "rape them" I hope my children grow up just like him! He's a good kid with great taste and a wonderful threat!
Nikki Zalewski and her man came to two screenings and bought like four shirts...we are going to have to make a golden statue of them both!
BOOTH HIGHLIGHTS
Michael Bell was so fucked up he would yell out to people who walked by our booth "This is your life story...but, only better!"
I don't think it helped drive sales, however, it was funny and sad, because, it's my life story.
William Katt, man, he had people coming up to him and just gushing. I saw a guy and a woman shake when they met him. And Bill was very cool with everyone he met. Some dude gave him a watch...others told him it was a life long dream to meet him, however, 20 dollars for a DVD, a signed photo and picture with Bill...no, the life long dream had a price!
Dave Hanson can sell! Holy Crap! Don't go to a Best Buy store, that fucker will have you purchasing shit you don't want...he's that good!
Joe Nieves and Scott Allen Rinker were pretty good salesmen also...they got a lot of woman to purchase the DVD.
And Kevin Sherwood was eye candy.
We sold 400 copies in 3 days, which was fantastic, that paid for the hotel rooms and all the meals. After Thursday night's screening, sales took off. We fell short with the cost to pay off the Flights, however, we chalk up to great PR and the hope that people at Gen Con will help spread the word to their friends.
Serious, in closing Gen Con was a fantastic experience, got to meet other filmmakers like the cool folks who did "Dork of the Rings" and the "Star Wars Mocumentary". Anybody, regardless of what budget they spend who makes a movie about "Gaming" I support.
I do want to thank all the folks who supported us at this years Gen Con, it was great time and we really appreciate it. If you need your car washed I will get Kevin Kirkpatrick to do it...it will cost me another baby from Fiji, however, you're all worth a baby or two form Fiji!
Wednesday, August 16
New Merchandise Available in the Gamers Store!
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 16 Aug 2006 02:59 PM PDT
Be the coolest one at your next gaming session or wear it proudly at the work place!
http://buygamers.com/sstore.htm
Check out the two new cool T-Shirts!
They come in all sizes from Small to Double XX!
T-Shirts!
"I live at home with my parents, it's just temporary...til' they die"
and
"Jerky Bitch!
Coming soon the ulimate "Gamers" package!
The Dungeon Lord Package
includes
One copy of the DVD
One T-Shirt of "I live at home"
and a bumper sticker of "I live at home"
or get that awful player in your gaming group
The Reese Sucks Package!
Includes
One copy of the DVD
One T-Shirt of "Jerky Bitch"
and a bumper sticker that states "The sucks all on you!"
Go directly to the link here!
http://buygamers.com/sstore.htm
Moviesonline gives "Gamers" 9 out of 10 stars! Full Review
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 16 Aug 2006 03:02 AM PDT
http://www.moviesonline.ca/movie_review_detail.php?id=2522
Gamers Movie Review
 By: The Dude
Alright, I think it's time I let you all in on something a little shocking. I was never that big into RPGs. (Role playing games, not rocket propelled grenades, which, sadly, Dan can attest my love for after seeing Miami Vice). And yet, I know so many of my friends who love them, and play them still, to this day. And I attended a fair amount of gaming nights in high school (and middle school, back when Alex Meyer was still around, and had the cool basement). I remember these evenings vividly. And while that's part of the charm involved with "Gamers", luckily it's not all the film relies on.
Gamers is a new indie film written and directed by Christopher Folino that chronicles an evening of gamers, still playing every Saturday night 13 years since high school has ended, as they are about 12 hours away from breaking the all time record for consecutive play. The gamers in the film play Demons, Nymphs, and Dragons (DND, get it? ) and have been doing so every night since high school. They are comprised of Kevin (Kevin Sherwood), Gordon (Kevin Kirkpatrick), Paul (Scott Allen Rinker), Fernando (Joe Nieves), and Reese (Dave Hanson), all geeks and gamers who occasionally take the game a little too far. Each has a dead end type job, and most live with their parents still. All but Fernando, who became a gamer simply because he sucks at soccer. (Or as they call it everywhere else in the world and in the pizza parlor I used to work at, football).
Gamers is done in mockumentary fashion, which I had started to grow tired of, but in this film it works quite well. While showing our heroes in their jobs/lives, the style allows for moments of improv that are far funnier than they should be. (I'm a particular fan of Kevin's job as a man who sings songs with your child's name in them. If there is justice in the world, "Wake Up Dick" will become a song that sweeps across the myspacers' ringtones). In fact, what Gamers does best are these moments of character, and it mines the humor from them, as opposed to putting nerds in a silly situation. That's one of the prime factors of enjoyability with the film. Although the moments can feel absurd, they are never out of place, and simply there for the purpose of "The joke". There are a lot of moments in the film that are filled with outright hilarity, crafting a mighty enjoyable time.
Filling out the cast are some familiar faces, such as John Heard and Beverly D'Angelo as Gordon's parents, who are much more cool than he is. The Greatest American Hero himself, William Katt (although I'll always remember him from House, not the doctor show), has a small role as Reese's boss who used to be a hard core gamer until he kicked the dragon and began playing Madden. And Ms. Weird Science herself, Kelly LeBrock, playing the role of hot mom. Far too brief a role, the film could have used more LeBrock. (But the scene she's in is quite good).
What I liked best about the film is that it had heart. You could tell a real love of these characters from Folino and the actors. Situations in the film rarely feel forced, instead having a nice natural flow. These characters would do these things. I must heap praise on the character of Reese, whom my fellow D&D players from High School might call Brock from the sheer amount of abuse Reese has to take from the Dungeon Lord Kevin. (Reese phoning Kevin with death threats for killing off his oldest character are priceless, and it was that scene that sold me on the film.) And how can you not like a movie where one of the main characters, after being told he won a trip Costa Rica, immediately responds "All right! That's where they shot Predator!" ?
I highly recommend Gamers to you. Mainly, to my friends, but to all people who would understand and appreciate the humor and time and love that went into crafting this film. I look forward to what Folino has next in store for all of us. Gamers is definitely one for those who like to look a little deeper to find a good movie. Thankfully it delivers in spades.
Tuesday, August 15
Gen Con Diaries Day 1 -The night before the Con
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 15 Aug 2006 11:29 PM PDT
Tuesday Night 9:25PM -Thousand Oaks, CA
I'm lost, I'm looking for an apartment address to drop off three DVD copies of the movie that appears somebody stole from the mailbox address that we sent them too days ago. I haven't packed for Gen Con, my flight leaves at 8AM Wednesday, I got no clue what the fuck our Gen Con booth is going to be and I don't have any T-Shirts yet. All I hear in my head is the sound of Puss 'N Boots, our Argentinean producer Fernando, telling him me how sales for the DVD have sucked so bad the last week. He's worried, it's a big ass bank loan. And earlier in the day my wife called me to inform me that the Sideshow Credit Card got declined for paying for postage and now's she's using our personal card to mail out DVDs.
I swear to God, this movie is like a 4th child, but, the one in the wheel chair, that can only eat food threw a straw. You know he's going to grow up to kick ass, and you just got to hang with him. Hell, we got some incredible reviews, however, sales don't reflect it yet...and it's that "yet" part I hold onto every day.
Earlier in the morning, I shipped out 11 boxes of DVDs of the movie to the hotel in Indy, each contain 50 DVDs. I took a guess based on a conversation I had with a guy at Gen Con So Cal on how many DVDs we might be able to sell in Indy. The guy wasn't a friend, however, that's all the data I got. Shit, what a great business man I am.
So as I continue to drive down each street with no lights over the signs, I'm getting a bit of a panic attack.
Will Gamers at Gen Con in Indy be able to understand that the movie is made by a life long gamer and is just meant be funny? How do we deal with a beloved cult fan film that shares the same name and another movie called Gamerz also?
Fuck it? I was stupid enough to make the movie, so what's the worst thing that can happen at Gen Con? Total rejection? Fuck, I had that at two prom nights, my whole life at film school, and now with all the top film festivals. I can handle rejection, I'll write about it in another script.
However, what kills me the most at this time, is the fact that I know the cost to send the cast to Gen Con with hotel rooms and plane flights alone will leave us with 300 on our credit cards.
To make sure we got money covered, I don't mail out all the bills for the music we paid for, I gamble that we will make up for it during Gen Con.
Then I find out that morning, that since we booked Scott Allen Rinker late, we don't have a hotel room for him yet, so I'm trying to call around while I'm driving.
What the fuck am I doing? I got three smalls kid's at home and a wife that I'm leaving behind for five days all on a gut feeling that Gen Con Indy is the place we need to launch awareness about our movie. I got a day job that I'm leaving for a few days that's just slamming, and this is how I'm spending my vacation? Working on whoring a movie nobody has ever heard off? What else? Now, on the phone, my daughter cries and is begging me to stay home, I don't even get the luxury of hanging out with them the night before I leave, I got to go and deliver copies to a buyer. I wonder for a brief second how many other fucking filmmakers who have shot on 35MM with real actors have to hand deliver their own movies to people?
It build character...christ, I got to be up to my ass in character then.
It's just another day living the dream of being an indie filmmaker or as I called it now "an indie marketing whore."
I find the address, turns out the woman is friends with Melissa Rivas and she saw the first screening ever in Calabasas Hills, CA. I thank her and now I'm suppose to meet the girlfriend of the T-Shirt guy who I have no address for. The T-Shirt guy isn't picking up his phone...fuck. I go home and I pack. I find the largest suitcase possible, that's how I'm bringing the T-shirts.
I take care of my oldest twin that night, I get no sleep, I can't get a hold of the t-shirt guy. I pack nothing, but the bare minimum. 4AM, I get a hold of the T-Shirt guy who gives me instructions to his girlfriends house where two boxes of T-Shirts await for me outside her porch. I'm picking up T-Shirts that I haven't seen, that are two days late the morning of my flight.
I say goodbye to my wife, and I drive real numb like up some hills to some kick ass homes in Westlake and I find the house with the t-shirts.
It's 5:50AM and I drive like hell to make it to LAX. I park at the yellow spot, and unload the two boxes of shirts into my luggage, I have to sit on the luggage to cram all the shirts in. People are driving by parking and laughing at me.
Just another day in the life on an indie whore.
Part 2 of many tomorrow.
Greatest Email ever by Nikki Zalewski
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 15 Aug 2006 10:21 AM PDT
Hello to all that worked on this hilarious film. My boyfriend Gary and
I were at GenCon this past four days. He was playing tons of Magic
Booster drafts, bought cards, played demos and did all the things his
heart desired. This was my first glimpse into this world. It was
fascinating to me. Everyone was having fun and sharing knowledge and
stories. There were so many people there and I even learned how to
play Magic (I am still at Reese level, but I am working on it). One of
my many passions is movies, any and every kind. We had heard that
there was a film festival going on at the Westin Hotel. We went on the
first day and saw "Dork of the Rings" and later saw "Gamers". Now
"Dork of the Rings," was ok but it all turned around when we saw
"Gamers" I laughed so hard I almost cried. It was such an entertaining
movie and I immediately said to my love " We gotta get this movie!!!"
We had gone to a later screening that night and at the end you were
all there. That added to my glee. You all told stories and Michael
Bell turned out to have one of the foulest mouths ever (it was great).
I am sadly not a gamer, but I understood a lot of what was going on
due to my Gary gamer boy. I just wanted to really tell you how much we
both enjoyed this movie. We saw it one more time the next day and
bought the movie, 4 t-shirts, and got to meet and get autographs from
everyone involved. Everyone was so nice to us and that made it even
more special. I wish you all the best in success with this movie.
We already decided that on Tuesday, Gary's Magic game night we will
begin the evening by screening "Gamers" for him and the guys. Thanks
for everything. I didn't know if there would be anything for me at
GenCon and turns out I was dead wrong. This movie will share
exceptional space in my movie collection.
Love always,
Nikki Zalewski and Gary Gabrus
Milwaukee/Waterford Wisconsin
We have the site bookmarked and I hope there is a sequel. You have two
guaranteed viewers here in the Midwest.
OVerdue Blog and how we got rejected by the Penny Arcade Guys over Language
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 15 Aug 2006 06:33 AM PDT
I just got back from Gen Con, where "Gamers" won "Best Professional Film" at the Gen Con Film Festival!
I got to thank Derek Kagemann and his family for going above and beyond to help us with our booth and all the amazing hospitality!
We went out there with William Katt, Michael Bell, Joe Nieves, Scott Allen Rinker, Kevin Sherwood and Dave Hanson! Oh the stories I have to tell, they will make you weep!
A very special thanks to the entire Gen Con team, especially the Gen Con Film Festival folks! Derek Gruder and crew!
I'm working on a proper blog and will have it up soon! Again, a great time at Gen Con! Derek, Jennifer and the little "L" Man are my heroes!
Some many cool things to talk about, that I will drag the hell out for content this week! For example,
we did a fucking crazy interview with Spike and the boys at www.gamestas.net, Michael Bell made me fucking cry and these guys are funny. There's a new review of the movie that's huge where we got a 9 out of 10!
And we got T-Shirts for sale! Yeap! Check out the gift shop by tomorrow morning or sooner!
However, instead of talking about how great the world is and how many people dug the movie, I have got to bring this up.
"GAMERS" REJECTED BY THE PENNY ARCADE GUYS FOR LANGUAGE
For all the folks who were hoping to catch a screening at the Penny Arcade Expo where we got invited to screen the movie...well, cancel that plan! Because, we just got rejected by The Sundance Film Festival...wait, no I mean! The Penny Arcade Guys for language.
To fully appreciate this, you got to check out the Penny Arcade cartoon strip for today.
Notice anything? Like the words "Shit" and "Fucking" and "Hell"
I don't mean to get all Alanis Morissette here...however, isn't it ironic?
Can you fucking believe that? Can you really wrap your mind around that twist of fucking fate? The Penny Arcade Guys? Serious...when did they become the Penny Arcade Tipper Gore Guys?
I wrote back and let them know, that we kind of already bought tickets and offered to check ID's for them! We do have children you know and believe it or not, we turned down several kids under 18 from purchasing the movie at Gen Con and even turned off the monitors when younger kids stopped over. And at the screenings we made sure there were no minors there.
Here's the email, and I love the part they had a test panel! It sounds so fucking movie studio like.
I thought it was just two guys who were funny and offensive. Everything changes I guess
So here's the great rejection email.
Hey, Chris- I've got some bad news. We screened it in front of our test
panel and they decided it was too explicit for our particular audience.
(yeah, I know, ironic, right? Coming from the Penny Arcade guys!) The issue
is that it's an all-ages show, and we can get into some serious legal issues
if we screen that without trying to check IDs etc, and the fact is we just
don't have the manpower to do so (we only have a staff of 150 or so for a
20k person show). Hopefully we can work something out for future shows, and
again, I apologize for not being able to give you an answer earlier but we
literally just got word today.
Take care, and let me know if you need anything else. Thanks.
Well, fuck that I guess. I've been reading the strip since it came out, kind of a hardcore fan. For me this is like having Bruce Springsteen sell out and do a car commercial.
Thank God, I at least have Springsteen.
Or let me say, thank fucking God I at least have fucking Springsteen!
Tell Al I did enjoy his movie Tipper...a fucking lot though!
Monday, August 7
Help Promote the Movie!
by
Christopher Folino
on Mon 07 Aug 2006 06:08 PM PDT
Attached is a banner ad, if you can help us get this linked on some sites, that would be awesome.
Our url is www.buygamers.com
Also, if you think your local Comic Book Store Might be interested in selling "Gamers The Movie" DVD, please go to the forum section and copy and paste the first section here
http://gamers.forumcircle.com/viewtopic.php?t=5
Again, this is an underground movie and we need your help.
We will send you SWAG, lots of SWAG if you help us!
T-Shirts are about to be announced and bumper stickers and more!
 1 Attachments
MySpace new best friend finalists and
by
Christopher Folino
on Mon 07 Aug 2006 06:05 AM PDT
If only we did a comedy about NASCAR...Talldega Nights, No 1 movie making 47 million. Will Ferrell and NASCAR...the new Big Mama House franchise, but for white people.
Come on you "Gamers" and people who are related to "Gamers" both video and RPG, show NASCAR fans they suck white trash ass! Compared to you! Go buy the movie today! Don't make me dress up like my 42nd level Paladin Eldabrant the broken Crusader and unleash a holy war on your "chaotic neutral" feelings towards the movie!
You got 12 reviews that were all pretty damn good. Do you think Hollywood is going to make a fucking movie about RPG Gamers?
No, so you got this movie! A real fucking movie shot on 35MM and some other fanboy movies shot on a video camera with crap audio, minus real actors and a real crew! Fucking Kelly LeBrock alone, your ass should be lined up outside my door. So "ELF UP" and throw down your gold pieces, credit cards or your wand of gold pieces and buy a damn DVD!
Christ, I sound just like NRP...but, cooler...in my head. However, they don't curse at their people or use words like "Elf Up"
IMDB MOVIEmeter is measured by the lower the film ranking the better the movie "Buzz is"
Last week Gamers was ranked 11,747
This week Gamers is ranked 7,747
A drop of 4,000 is a whole hell of a lot.
How did this happen?
We had a lot of articles finally get posted and of course Beverly D'Angelo on Entourage is fucking amazing...in both sense of the word.
A great shout out for the movie.
http://www.unscripted360.com/ -Episode 7, does a nice little shout out to the movie and again some critic thinks Dave Hanson "Reese" can act...I swear, it was all Jim Henson's people bringing "Hanson" to life
Geek Woman strikes again! We are now globally covered!
And Now the Finalist for our new MySpace Best Friend contest, not in any order at all.
I think by tomorrow, we should be down to three and maybe have them write some more stuff?
Email me or post your favorite pick. The winner will be announced from the Gen Con Convention this week and they will get a phone call from the entire cast there. William Katt, Michael Bell, Dave Hanson, Joe Nieves, Scott Allen Rinker, Kevin Sherwood and myself.
Also, they will win a free autographed DVD of the movie signed by the people just mentioned.
So, this is a big fucking deal people! Forget Global Warming, it's time to help pick "Gamers the movie's" New MySpace Best Friend for the next 15 days or so!
1st Contestant GNARLS BARKLEY IS CRAZY -Aiko.Adonia wrote
Here's why I'm your myspace best friend:
1. Remember that time you were drunk and puking in the bathroom who held your hair? Me
2. Remember that time you hit on my mom and I stood up for you when our other lamer friends made fun of you.
3. How about the time when you were drunk and ran the car into a lightpost? Who switched seat with you? Me even though I went to jail and you didn't bail me out.
I'm still your friend.
That's why you should pick me as your myspace friend. Don't make me remember that time you dressed up as a lady and went to that bar and some dude took you home. Who was there for you then? ME!
Pick me,
A
GAH PICK ME!! Remember me!? GAHH My car died though, so I'm not QUITE as pimpin gamer beast as I wuz... but I scored this freakin SWEET ride... pure heaven this puppy. This sic ride would make Pee-Wee Herman shat himself! Think high powered suped up Vespa from outer space! If you've seen FLCL then you know exactly what I'm talking about! WAHHHH! Now I can listen to all my phat beats while cruizin the intergalactic speedway of love! You're going to need me around when you need a standby to make girls think your so hot too.... aight whoo! I'm still doing the last few modifications to it. I've already got my 360 strapped on and dual screen for multiplayer madness. But I'm having trouble trying to figure out how to appropriately attach my lifesize "wookie" replica.... you can never go wrong with the power of Chewbacca at your back.... or something. ahhh sweet! Best thing ever, I just found some wicked decals for the sides of my ride! Flaming Dice!!!
Oh yea!!! and I have three testicles!!! Hah.
Noo, I wish though.
You guys are great, really, but only with me as your friend.
Stephan
Contestant #3 -MonKeycat
I should be your my space best friend, because 1. I love movies and want nothing more than to make/ watch movies all day forever. 2. the only time I have no interest in movies is when I'm having sex or role-playing. I love DND, world of darkness, riffs, heroes unlimited, mechton zeta. You name I play it. 3. I'm super stoaked to see your movie, and if I got a free copy it would make that a lot easer. 4. all the rest of those losers aren't cool enough to be your best friend.
Contestant #4 -Jason
I reckon I should be your My Space best friend because I have the best stories to tell.
Once I was in the street here in downtown Sydney. My friend and I were having a smoke, which is they style down here in Australia after one has consumed a fantastic you stupidly overpriced meal. Anyway I digress. We were standing in the street when a strange homeless lady, carrying plastic bags laden with books stormed up to some girls standing near us.
Lady - "Don't think I don't know what you know I've been saying about you"
And she stormed off.
After finishing our cigarette (which my friends and I refer to as "smelly lollies") we walked off up the street. And sure enough here comes homeless book lady. She stormed up to my friend and I, look at me, then to my friend, across the road from where we were standing and then back to us.
Lady - "You people have had it"
And off she went storming up the road, bags of books in hand. We went back to the car and drove home.
The End.
I have plenty more stories, please ask if you would like some more.
J :)
P.S. Bookgirl was wearing a beautiful floral mu mu at the time and a lovely pair of flip flops which certainly didn't match.
Contestant #5-El Diablo Blanca
I think I should be Gamers Best Friend because im a big time gamer. Gaming is my all consuming hobby, and I love it. All of my friends and I get together at least once a week and play all day tournaments for hours on end, usually more than 12 people in a room. We don't do this for money like some gamers, we do this because we love to game. Gaming is life to us, myself especially, because of my competitive nature, I always want to be better than everyone else. Since "Gamers" is picking a new best friend, why not make it one of your own, a true gamer, battle tested, baptized by the fires of gaming.
Truly yours,
Michael
P.S. I have 3 testicles (idk will that help?)
Contestant #6-Kyle
So after three hours of Guitar Hero and 6 hours of Elder Scrolls, I have to poop. So I go and drop a nice log and when it comes time to flush, that dirty bastard just wont go down. I tried flushing more times but that just made the turd angry and he made skid marks everywhere! So I decide Ill break it up with the toilet brush. So I break it into three pieces and whipe and flush that bad boy. I told him who is boss. And just when I least expect it he makes a return with some dirty water. I started to attack it with my plunger of death, but that jerk keeps fighting me. I ended up loosing the battle. And the dirty turd left its mark on the floor, on the rug in the bathroom, on the toilet brush, and mutilated my plunger of death. So that's why you should make me your friend because I have lost to a turd from hell that my colon made to get back at me for those spicy enchiladas I ate last week!
Okay, so there you have it...
Somebody kick me in the nuts know...please!
Friday, August 4
Bonus Blog for Today
by
Christopher Folino
on Fri 04 Aug 2006 11:45 AM PDT
State of Things
For an Indie film that has never played in any major film festival "Gamers" is doing "Amazing" in the press.
Yesterday, Mark Smith from Game Chronicles gave us an 8.5 out 10! Christ, that's like so much better than any fucking "Wayan's Movie" combined!
The press has been so generous with free advertising and front page reviews and mentions.
Sadly, I understand why NPR begs their listeners for money, I really, really do. I promise I'll donate this year NPR.
Getting a consumer to buy our DVD online like getting Paris Hilton to close her legs for one minute...it's nearly impossible.
However, it sure beats getting raped by a bad distribution deal and lifeless blood suckers like National Lampoon.
Head-Up, Chin-Up....Fuck Hollywood. Support true Indie Filmmaking...just the ones that don't suck.
This is Cool
Mike Everleth from IFILM, pretty much is a rock star! How fucking cool is this! On IFILM.COM Baby!
Dave Hanson and Beef Jerky, ahhh, soon to be an American Tradition every gaming night! Fuck Mountain Dew, it's Reese's Jerky...bitch!
Thank you Mike! And for all three of you who read my blog, while your on IFILM
go to this link to see Dave Cravens Toy Wars Episode 11 & 12
Dave was my former boss at Interplay and the boy has mad skills. He did everything in After Effects.
I got to voice a few of the toys, see if you can figure it out!
The David Lawrence Show
Last night, Kevin Sherwood and I were on the radio! That's right, we went to the studio and hung out with David Lawrence on his syndicated show.
We went on after Jodie Sweetin (Stephanie Tanner from Full House) I kept my mouth shut, I remember saying something on an old blog about how "Full House" drove a cast member to do meth. My daughter loves that show. I'd rather get kicked in the nuts by Chuck Norris than to watch that show ever..ever..again.
So how did Kevin and I do? Do you even have to ask? I practice hours and hours naked holding a bowl of jello (Real Genius line) infront of a mirror interviewing various body parts about the movie "Gamers"
Our interview, comes during the middle of the show, here's the link.
NEW "GAMERS" MYSPACE BEST FRIEND FINALIST
Wait for it...tomorrow's blog!
8.5 out of 10 review by Mark Smith from Game Chronicles
by
Christopher Folino
on Fri 04 Aug 2006 07:12 AM PDT
http://www.gamechronicles.com/features/gamers/dvd.htm
GAMERS: Unrated DVD Exposes Ultimate Gaming Nerds
Written by Mark Smith
August 3, 2006
Until last month Office Space had been my all-time favorite movie since it released back in 1999. That movie came out at a time when I was working in a cubicle environment and I could identify with the characters and relate to all the pokes at office etiquette. The following year I lost that job (something about TPS cover sheets), and got into gaming (video gaming) full-time.
So when Grandma’s Boy – a movie about gaming nerds who work at a video game company and live with their parents (or grandparents) hit DVD I was strangely compelled to watch and rewatch this movie until I can now recite the dialogue pretty much verbatim.
Now, a month later and a few thousand brain cells lighter I am asked to review a new indie film called GAMERS. Admittedly, I was taken in by the title immediately thinking this was another take on the lifestyles of obsessive nerds such as those portrayed in Trekkies, but with a gaming twist. For those most part, I was right, but rather than video games, GAMERS explores the mysterious and obsessive world of role-playing.
GAMERS tells the twisted tale of four “losers” who suck at sports, have lame jobs, no girlfriends, and still live at home. (Why wasn't I asked to consult on this?) They all met in high school where they started playing “Demons, Nymphs, and Dragons” (DND). Interestingly enough, the filmmakers did have the rights to use “Dungeons & Dragons” until about two days before filming started. Apparently, D&D didn’t want their role-playing game to be cast in an unfriendly light.
Anyway, for the past 23 years these guys have been coming together to play this game and they have logged more than 74,568 hours, just 12 hours short of breaking the world record. GAMERS takes us on a comical journey that explores the events leading up to this momentous 12-hour event as well as delving into the past (and futures) of each of the players.
Shot in a mocumentary format not unlike that of Spinal Tap, Chris Folino has created a rather unique piece of cinematic landscape that blends elements of Napoleon Dynamite with established classics like Office Space and Grandma’s Boy. The movie is narrated by Michael Bell who already has more than 260 voice and acting credits in movies, TV, and video games, giving the entire project a lot more "cred".
Even more impressive is just how good the production value of this film is given the shoestring budget. While I never caught a dollar figure out of the commentaries, given the fact that this film was shot using two cars and a few houses, all within the same neighborhood, I’m guessing the home theater I used to watch this movie might have cost more than the film itself.
The movie focuses on four main characters; Kevin, the Dungeon Lord (DL) who keeps his non-DND life a secret from his players. He is an aspiring musician who sings kids songs as well as performs for his players before gaming.
Dave Hanson steals the entire show with his obsessive attitudes and mostly-improved scenes. Just turn this guy loose in front of the camera and hilarity will ensue whether he is stuffing his underwear with jerky or humping a telephone while cursing his DL for killing Farah, his original female cleric, three minutes into the game. And don’t even thing about pirating this DVD or you’ll have to deal with Dave after the FBI is through will you.
Scott Rinker comes into this production with an impressive list of TV credits that include The Unit, Crossing Jordon, Enterprise, and several episodes of Ghost Whisperer. He plays Paul, probably the most normal guy in the bunch, which isn’t saying much. He is the character responsible for videotaping their game sessions all these years after his dream of becoming Ronald McJones, a Mexican fast food clown, was shattered after viewing some gay clown porn. He also has a self-imposed ban on swearing, which takes an ugly turn at the end of the movie.
Supporting the core cast of gaming geeks is an impressive line-up of Hollywood talent in a variety of off-the-wall cameo roles. When I say “impressive” I’m referring to the fact that the filmmakers were actually able to talk these people (or their agents) into appearing in this film.
We start off with a hilarious performance from John Heard (Home Alone, Battlestar Galactica) who plays Gordon’s dad. Mom is played by Beverly D'Angelo (also known as the mom in the Vacation movies). These two characters have a few great moments ranging from watching PPV porn on Gordon’s “Nelson”-equipped TV to attending a retirement party for one of Gordon’s DND characters.
William Katt, who has more than one hundred projects on his resume, turns in a brilliant performance as Reese’s boss and ex-RPG gamer who is now obsessed with the franchise mode in Madden Football. If only we all had bosses this cool. "The 'sucks' all on you."
Kelly LeBrock, best known for her performance as fantasy-girl Lisa in Weird Science, is twenty years older but just as sexy as ever in her role as Angela’s mom who answers the door in mid-orgasm. Angela is played by the stunning Meredith Zealy (Comeliness: 17) who some might remember as Maggie in The Notebook. Don't even attempt a saving throw - you will be captivated by her charm every second she is on the screen.
All of these actors turn in dynamic performances that make you wonder if there was even a script. Everything just seems to flow naturally and is very believable. If you didn’t recognize some of the bigger Hollywood talent you’d actually think these were the real parents, friends, and coworkers of these gamers.
The flow of the movie is pretty random at times with flashbacks that defy the “mocumentary” concept, but serve as a much-needed foundation for the characters. There are a few “Adam Sandler” gross-out moments that will certainly stand out including a Something About Mary-inspired scene where Fernando (dressed in goggles and raincoat) is collecting horse semen in a bucket, and a disturbing moment where Reese gets to “second base” with a “real” girl that should not be watched by anyone who is lactose intolerant.
The DVD has a few bonus features that include several deleted scenes, two feature-length commentary tracks with assorted cast and crew, as well as interviews with cast members about their experience with the movie and their favorite scene(s). Commentary #1 is hysterical with most of the primary cast as well as Chris Folino injecting humorous anecdotes about the shoot. Perhaps it was just watching the movie three times in a 24 period, but I didn’t have nearly as much fun with the second commentary track. Maybe I’ll try again later.
While Game Chronicles typically doesn’t review movies, I feel somewhat compelled to score this film in some fashion, so why not use our game criteria slightly tweaked for a DVD.
Filmmaking: 8
This is definitely a movie created by those who loved RPG's and in some ways is probably a bit auto-biographical. It doesn't really put down the game/genre or the people who play it, and you're likely to see a bit of yourself in the story. Technically, the production rivals anything that is coming out of Hollywood with a similiar concept and budget. I enjoyed GAMERS infinitely more than Napoleon Dynamite, and this film should become an inspiration to all would-be filmmakers.
Graphics: 8
This is a no-frills production shot mostly on 35mm in the houses and cars of the filmmakers. There is a lot of handheld work and some impressive (and likely dangerous) scenes done in cars without complicated rigging and production vehicles. The only special effects shots that really come to mind is the opening with large red d20's tumbling toward you while Loverboy's Workin' for the Weekend rocks the house, and a funny CGI parrot who has gone insane listening to Charlie Manson's book on tape.
Sound: 8
It's a documentary so I wasn't expecting any fancy surround mixes. The audio mix is very good with equal sound levels for all the dialogue, and I didn't miss a single line, which sadly cannot be said for some of the more modern surround mixes. There is some great music, both licensed and original including the aforementioned Loverboy song as well as some hysterical childrens music created by Kevin Sherwood that will have you singing "Everybody Loves Dick" long after the movie is over.
Value: 8
GAMERS is 87 minutes, which is probably just about right for a documentary. The dual commentary tracks, deleted scenes, and cast interviews will certainly offer several more hours of enjoyment. It's only $16 and likely to become your new favorite party DVD.
Overall: 8.5
A great movie, especially for fans of the RPG genre and losers who still live at home. There are moments of sheer hilarity and gross-out scenes that will have you spewing your Monster energy drink across the room. You probably won't find this DVD in stores so go to their website and get your copy today.
Thursday, August 3
All Things Considered on Today's Blog
by
Christopher Folino
on Thu 03 Aug 2006 04:18 AM PDT
First off, thank you again to everyone who has bought a DVD of "Gamers" to date, you have no idea that you alone are keeping us afloat. Serious, the money you spent has allowed us to feed starving children in Africa...okay, it's allowed us to pay off our monthly loan, go invest in some merchandise, that we hope you'll also buy, and to go to Gen Con Indy to see if we can really sell the hell out of this movie. More about Gen Con Indy that is happening August 10th - August 13th in a little bit.
Listen to my annoying girlie voice at this time and channel!
Thursday, August 3rd at 8PM
Sirius -Sirius Stars 102
XM -Open Road 171
Thanks again to David Lawrence and Lili VonSchtupp for the opportunity to "Whore" their listeners the movie.
Man, I'm not funny like Michael Bell and I can't curse...I got nothing. No cursing they're taking away my special powers!
So, this is a true story, we are down to about 300 dollars left in the Sideshow Productions bank account and on all our credit cards, because, we took all our money and spent it on Gen Con Indy. Good lord it's expensive to just show up with some cast members and get a booth! And please bring cash or go to the ATM machine before coming to our booth. Sadly, we can't afford the $600 dollar internet hook-up...man, does a wand of blow jobs come with that internet hook-up?
Serious, if you want to make money, fuck making a movie, start a convention where they charge you $25.00 for an additional fold-out chair to rent...did Jesus Christ or Paris Hilton sit on that fold-out chair? Or did some WWE star use that chair to hit somebody?
Fuck, Fuck, and Fuck! And the scary thing is that this is a blind craps shoot, serious, will hardcore younger "Gamers" get that this is a movie made by "Gamers" making fun of ourselves...if a kid dressed as a level 22 Paladin starts "bitching to me" about how "I'm giving Gamers a bad name" I will skull fuck him in my level 48 level Druid costume that makes me look like Stevie Nicks. Serious, call it hate-on-hate Paladin crime, I don't give a shit.
This movie is based on my pathetic life that role playing helped me escape from, not theirs...go make your own fucking "gaming movie" and you can called it "Gameeers"
Just add some extras E's, and you can piss off a whole group of fanboys too! Join the club, get in the back of the line bitch. And good luck explaining to people the difference between VHS and 35MM film!
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed the film online in chat rooms, message boards, and to their parole officers, we really appreciate it. We appreciate more the folks who have liked it of course.
Tomorrow, because, MYSPACE sucks and is slower than dial-up powered by a drunk two-legged donkey, I'll post the finalist for our new MYSpace Best friend.
And finally, I'd like to kill the rumors right now, that Mel Gibson stole the line "Sugar Tits" from our movie that we cut out of the film. It's true that his production company has a DVD of the movie with that line in it. However, I have a hard believing Mel watched the movie, since it only offends the Jewish community in one scene...I hear it has to have at least three offensive Jewish remarks before he'll watch the movie!
Wednesday, August 2
Eight Sided Funny -New Review by Jonathan W. Hickman from Entertainment Insiders
by
Christopher Folino
on Wed 02 Aug 2006 04:38 PM PDT
Eight Sided Funny!by Jonathan W. Hickman
reviewed: 2006-08-02
Geekhood is celebrated at its comic best in "Gamers" a very funny film being distributed on DVD through the website http://www.buygamers.com/. Here's a film that wallows (literally) in all things nerd mixing Farrelly Brothers type humor with 1980s nostalgia. Imagine working in cameos by Kelly LeBrock, William Katt, and Beverly D'Angelo and making such eclectic casting work throughout a feature.
"Gamers" follows four friends who have spent the better part of their lives devoted to a role playing game called "Demons, Nymphs and Dragons" (shortened to "DND" an obvious parody of Dungeons & Dragons). All of them have reached their thirties and still live at home. Because they have spent 23 years playing the game, they are about to break a record for the longest running DND game. How can they prove they've been playing that long continuously? Well, Paul (Scott Alan Rinker) has been video taping it throughout the years. And footage from past years is used as flashback material.
Having spent so much of their lives playing a game every night has taken its toll. One of the original crew, Johnny (Ben Messmer), took the game too seriously and after attempting to decapitate someone with a pocket-knife now sits in jail. To fill the place left by the departing Johnny, the group took on the equally imbalanced Reese (Dave Hanson) who is agonizing over the death of Farrah his latest character in DND. Reese calls a local radio station continuously requesting music dedicated to Farrah and is on the verge of losing his job due to emotional outbursts. Reese has one of the movie's best scenes when he is confronted about his emotional problems by his boss (played by William Katt). The boss' suggestion to Reese is pretty profound.
Each one of the four characters' backstories is developed through a combination of interviews and flashbacks (using fake video footage). The film plays fast and loose with the whole mockumentary device in which a camera crew follows them around asking questions and videotaping. The narrator is non-other-than Michael Bell the voice of the "e! True Hollywood Story" series. The press notes tell us that Bell's voice work might give him the longest list of credits on IMDB. Take a look, it's a long list.
"Gamers" is essentially a forum for endless sketch comedy thinly held together by the story of four chums attempting to break the DND continuous game playing record. Instead of trying to resolve the story threads, the filmmakers go for laughs some of which are huge and others that fall flat. But what is most surprising is how well the named talent is used in the context of the story. Role-playing games like Dungeons & Dragons were at their zenith in the 1980s. And casting several actors in bit roles that had hits during that time makes perfect sense.
The film's best scene has to be when Reese has a heart to heart with his boss played by the "Greatest American Hero" himself William Katt. I remember that show and subtle references are made to it within "Gamers" where Katt plays a levelheaded boss who really has empathy for Reese. Listen closely to what is said between Reese and his boss, there just might be the film's only real moral there. And the melding of the old role playing games (played with dice) and the newer concepts of virtual reality within a video game console are interesting. One might be inspired to take up something called Madden Football Franchise mode, if it exists.
The other cameos are really just for laughs particularly a flashback scene in which 1980s diva Kelly LeBrock asks the guys whether they've ever had an orgasm or not. And John Heard makes a recurring appearance as one of the player's fathers who's married to Beverly D'Angelo. Heard's character is a veterinarian and swinger. Some of Heard's scenes work even though I could have used less of the swinger story-line.
If "Gamers" missteps it is in being too committed to endless sketch comedy instead of trying to tell a coherent story. Some flashbacks are gratuitous especially one late in the film involving Reese's prom date and another involving a psychotic parrot. But as a showcase for writer/director Christopher Folino's talent, "Gamers" is just the kind of thing to get him noticed. A superior example of his comedic writing gift has to be the character of Kevin (played well by Kevin Sherwood). Kevin, the game's Dungeon Lord, composes custom children songs at his day job. And when he has to write a song about a kid named Dick, it's hilarious. The character of Kevin is brilliant and could easily slip right into a Christopher Guest ("A Mighty Wind," "Best In Show") movie.
"Gamers" is available for purchase through the film's website: http://www.buygamers.com/. With any luck, it will soon be available at video stores throughout the country. Like last year's "Never Been Thawed," "Gamers" will no doubt have legions of fans waiting to see what filmmaker Folino comes up with next.
Jonathan W. Hickman
Tuesday, August 1
Viva La Tuesday Blog
by
Christopher Folino
on Tue 01 Aug 2006 06:56 AM PDT
Michael Bell's Radio Interview last night
Here's the link to listen to last nights show
Was Michael Bell funny? That's like asking is George W. Bush hated in the Middle East and in most of the world now?
We sent over some clips from the movie and these folks are so kind that they asked me to join them as a guest in their studio Thursday, August 3rd at 8PM
Sirius -Sirius Stars 102
XM -Open Road 171
Thanks again to David Lawrence and Lili VonSchtupp for being so kind to the movie, not many people in radio have even respond to my letters and free bottle of "Gamers" urine that I send them.
And Michael Bell didn't curse once...fucking shit, I'm going to have a mother of fucking bitch time not swearing like a mother fucking ass monkey on crack...and shit...word.I wonder what my twin boys first words will be "That's fucking bullshit daddy" or "does a wand of blow jobs come with that diaper change?"
Oh, the tears are swelling up as I write this blog.
Calling all friends on MySpace
The three finalist for who wants to be Gamers The Movie new MySpace best friend is happening.
I have to admit, no Asian strippers signed up, perhaps they're turned off that the movie isn't a porn? Well, at least a heterosexual porn some would say.
Go join our MySpace page and win a chance to receive a free DVD of the movie "Air Con" -Just kidding "Gamers"
http://www.myspace.com/gamersmovie
"Gamers"Merchandise is coming!
Have credit card will max out. Going Gen or bust. Last night we greenlighted the creation of two different bumper stickers and one t-shirt.
We will make them available for sale on the web site and at Gen Con Indy.
Best Quote of the month
Regarding Gamers and how many DVDs we've sent off to the press to review in comparison to how many we sold to consumers.
"Next movie, we show it for free to the public, and then charge all the press people money to watch it."
Fernando Velloso -Executive Producer "Gamers"
|
